Happy

Morning comes too soon to those who want the moments to stretch on forever.  We got up and I fought with ATT about shutting off my phone. We snoozed a bit and then headed to the airport. We had the discussion…and I didn’t cry, just like I promised him. As a matter of fact, I think I did pretty good at hiding exactly what I was feeling.  But man oh man, I hated watching him walk away…Although he looked mighty fine in those jeans of his!!  I came home and couldn’t find my remotes to the television in the living room. Turns out that when we wrestled around on the sofa, they slipped through the divider cushions to the floor below.  Ha ha!

So this weekend firmly established that I have a long distance boyfriend. He’s good with it and doesn’t mind the distance (he calls it deployment), he just wants to make sure that my head is in the same place his is at.  I find that kind of funny since I didn’t know where his head was at for the longest time, i.e. until his birthday!

Definite lack of communication, but I have the feeling that he’s just one of those guys that has to finish off the old stuff before he can attack the new.  The things he says and does are not “Playah” things.  They are serious and thoughtful.  It may have taken awhile, but I’m not trading what I have right now.  I know my friends have misgivings and they make their comments...Even my Mother's flippant "Oh, you do exist " (as if to say he's one of those damned M&Ms in the Christmas commercial) kinda set me off. 

I really do get where they're coming from, especially after all the damned soap opera stuff.  And a lot of this was my fault.  I couldn't get this man out of my head and everyone around me could see that! I didn't do a very good job at hiding my feelings (and I used to be so fucking good at it!!!).  My friends love me and want to make sure that I'm not hurt.  But life is hurt, it's pain, it's taking chances and hoping that you finally do get that once-in-a-lifetime shot at being happy.  This man makes me happy.