If you watched Saturday Night Live last weekend, you would’ve seen Amy Poehler do the “Palin Rap”. OMG...this is so damned funny. It doesn’t matter if you’re a Democrat or Republican...if Sarah can laugh at this...so can you!
http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/update-palin-rap/773781/
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Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
Talk about Talent
I wanted you all to the the artwork of Kimber. This girl has so much talent, it makes me insanely jealous. It's fitting that I post this picture, because my soul needs it right now. Beauty heals the heart, and this girl knows beauty. Thanks for sharing and allowing me to share it.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Prepping the house for Bunko!
So it’s my turn to host Bunko for the month of October. If you know anything about me, you’d know that housekeeping is a dirty word to me. I’d rather work outside, or get greasy working on the cars, etc. It’s worse than the “C” word in my humble opinion, so from here on out, we’ll just refer to it as the “H” word.
I’m doing the “H” word around the house to prepare for this auspicious occasion. I’ve had a number of people offer to bail me out, i.e. I host at their home, which I may do in the future, but I felt this would be a good motivator for me to get off my tushie and do what needs to be done.
After looking at all the other ladies homes, mine doesn’t quite measure up. They have these huge homes and very nicely decorated, while I have a small home and I’ve decorated like a bachelor pad. Not my thing. Diz don’t do froufrou flowers and pretty house decorations. What is a he/she like me supposed to do? Not only that, since our home is small, I’m trying to figure out where I’m putting 3 bunko tables for these ladies to sit. I think this means that I’m going to do some temporary furniture re-arranging. This means that I’m going to have open spots on the carpet that shows where the furniture was. Good Lord….What the hell did I bite off?
The nice thing is that these chicks are pretty cool about life in general, so I think they’ll take my humble abode in stride and work with it. Besides…if I get them all drunk, they won’t see the tiny details…right? Will they notice the horrible stains on the seafoam green carpet that I hope to yank up and replace? And who the hell in their right mind would put a seafoam green carpet in a house located in red clay dirt? Certainly not me! Ah well, gotta suck this one up. Hey…maybe I can hire a housecleaner to come and take care of it for me?
I’m doing the “H” word around the house to prepare for this auspicious occasion. I’ve had a number of people offer to bail me out, i.e. I host at their home, which I may do in the future, but I felt this would be a good motivator for me to get off my tushie and do what needs to be done.
After looking at all the other ladies homes, mine doesn’t quite measure up. They have these huge homes and very nicely decorated, while I have a small home and I’ve decorated like a bachelor pad. Not my thing. Diz don’t do froufrou flowers and pretty house decorations. What is a he/she like me supposed to do? Not only that, since our home is small, I’m trying to figure out where I’m putting 3 bunko tables for these ladies to sit. I think this means that I’m going to do some temporary furniture re-arranging. This means that I’m going to have open spots on the carpet that shows where the furniture was. Good Lord….What the hell did I bite off?
The nice thing is that these chicks are pretty cool about life in general, so I think they’ll take my humble abode in stride and work with it. Besides…if I get them all drunk, they won’t see the tiny details…right? Will they notice the horrible stains on the seafoam green carpet that I hope to yank up and replace? And who the hell in their right mind would put a seafoam green carpet in a house located in red clay dirt? Certainly not me! Ah well, gotta suck this one up. Hey…maybe I can hire a housecleaner to come and take care of it for me?
Thursday, September 18, 2008
"Still Bad, Still Hot Enough To Get Away With It!"
Do you love this card...or what??? My heading is the verbiage in the card. I tell ya, I have some seriously wack friends...and I wouldn't have it any other way! Today we went out to lunch to celebrate Kimmy Lou's and my birthdays. What fun! We scarfed down on Mexican food from Celia's, laughed and cried. Teensy and Al gave me this cool, beautiful tea set. It's totally me with butterflies and flowers, but NOT too froufrou! And Kimmy Lou...she have me a picture of my SerenieBeanie in a beautiful frame. It's on my desk, but I took a picture of it with my phone. I cried. Couldn't help it. I would die for these Ladies!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
The Women
So I got together to see “The Women” with some fun chicks. I only found out today that it’s a remake and was just shown on TMC the other day…damn the bad luck for missing it.
I loved the movie, although I think it’s more a chick-flick than anything else. I have to say that the actresses chosen for the characters fit them well. I also have to say that it was so nice to see Jada Pinket-Smith in an unusual role. She played it to perfection. I love Annette Benning, more than Meg Ryan, although she seemed to suit her role, but Annette is in a class by herself. She dresses up and dresses down well.
I left the movie thinking about my girlfriends and how lucky I am to have them in my life. The unusual thing is that I have about eight to ten really tight girlfriends that I admire and love. How lucky is that? If you have one or two, you’re doing good. And although there is a couple at the top of the list, to have a list at all is pretty rare.
Yea, I piss and moan about the bad things going on, and I usually have some serious family issues pressing down, but how lucky am I to have good friends to lean on. To know that I can pick up the phone and they’ll listen to me, help me out, help me hide the bodies, provide an alibi, etc.
Ya know, I think I’m going to plan an evening honoring the wonderful women in my life and invite them all for some fun, food, alcohol and gossip. This means I’ll have to clean my house again…Uhhgg.
I loved the movie, although I think it’s more a chick-flick than anything else. I have to say that the actresses chosen for the characters fit them well. I also have to say that it was so nice to see Jada Pinket-Smith in an unusual role. She played it to perfection. I love Annette Benning, more than Meg Ryan, although she seemed to suit her role, but Annette is in a class by herself. She dresses up and dresses down well.
I left the movie thinking about my girlfriends and how lucky I am to have them in my life. The unusual thing is that I have about eight to ten really tight girlfriends that I admire and love. How lucky is that? If you have one or two, you’re doing good. And although there is a couple at the top of the list, to have a list at all is pretty rare.
Yea, I piss and moan about the bad things going on, and I usually have some serious family issues pressing down, but how lucky am I to have good friends to lean on. To know that I can pick up the phone and they’ll listen to me, help me out, help me hide the bodies, provide an alibi, etc.
Ya know, I think I’m going to plan an evening honoring the wonderful women in my life and invite them all for some fun, food, alcohol and gossip. This means I’ll have to clean my house again…Uhhgg.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Birthday Blues
Tomorrow is the birthday of one of the most beautiful, intelligent, fun, women of the universe...as I know it. A flash of this girls eyes sends me over the moon. To me, there can be no finer woman on the face of the earth. Don't get me wrong, there are some that come damned close, but not as close as this one....
Yes, it's my Serenie Beanie's 6th birthday. I won't be able to spend it with her, as her Mother is in one of those "using children as pawns" modes. My heart is breaking. I was mailing her package to her and the post office lady sees the address and says "this address is close, how come you just don't take it over there?" Reasonable question, difficult to answer. I broke into tears and had the poor woman thinking it was all her fault.
This is one of those times that life isn't fair and you have to suck it up. But as long as she's happy and having fun at school, as long as she is unaware of what is going on, as long as her heart knows that I love her, then I can be ok.
So for all of you awesome Aunties out there, go hug your nieces and tell them how much you love them for me. Look into their eyes and tell them that you'll be there for them No matter what! Breathe them in and enjoy the scent of life with them in it.
Happy 6th Birthday my dearest angel. Your Auntie always loves you!
Yes, it's my Serenie Beanie's 6th birthday. I won't be able to spend it with her, as her Mother is in one of those "using children as pawns" modes. My heart is breaking. I was mailing her package to her and the post office lady sees the address and says "this address is close, how come you just don't take it over there?" Reasonable question, difficult to answer. I broke into tears and had the poor woman thinking it was all her fault.
This is one of those times that life isn't fair and you have to suck it up. But as long as she's happy and having fun at school, as long as she is unaware of what is going on, as long as her heart knows that I love her, then I can be ok.
So for all of you awesome Aunties out there, go hug your nieces and tell them how much you love them for me. Look into their eyes and tell them that you'll be there for them No matter what! Breathe them in and enjoy the scent of life with them in it.
Happy 6th Birthday my dearest angel. Your Auntie always loves you!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
"If it looks like trouble...Count me in"
The title is a quote from the card....
So our buds call up and ask if we want to BBQ and stay the night last weekend. It was actually a pre-birthday celebration…woohoo! I got to walk around with scallop shells on my boobs…ok, it was a scallop shell bra. Kel wore the coconut shell bra…oooohhh la la. Kel and Rog spoiled me (they always do) with chocolate cake, my very own bottle of Patron Anejo Tequila, an earring and necklace set (beautiful and totally me) and a sweet card (see pic below).
Rog cooked the steak to perfection and we totally scarfed down. Cam had a friend over who’s birthday is on the same day as mine…coinkeydink, but fun. We sat out by the pool and did shots of tequila and laughed and had a splendiferous time! Cam offered to give up his bed (he’s such a righteous young man), but I brought the air mattress and the man and I went to sleep.
Woke up with a headache, but it could’ve been so much worse! We all went out to breakfast and had a good time. Usually I can scarf mine down, but this time, I only ate half. Hmmm…. We lounged again by the pool and then headed home. Thank you Rog, Kel and Cam for making me feel so special. You guys ROCK.
So our buds call up and ask if we want to BBQ and stay the night last weekend. It was actually a pre-birthday celebration…woohoo! I got to walk around with scallop shells on my boobs…ok, it was a scallop shell bra. Kel wore the coconut shell bra…oooohhh la la. Kel and Rog spoiled me (they always do) with chocolate cake, my very own bottle of Patron Anejo Tequila, an earring and necklace set (beautiful and totally me) and a sweet card (see pic below).
Rog cooked the steak to perfection and we totally scarfed down. Cam had a friend over who’s birthday is on the same day as mine…coinkeydink, but fun. We sat out by the pool and did shots of tequila and laughed and had a splendiferous time! Cam offered to give up his bed (he’s such a righteous young man), but I brought the air mattress and the man and I went to sleep.
Woke up with a headache, but it could’ve been so much worse! We all went out to breakfast and had a good time. Usually I can scarf mine down, but this time, I only ate half. Hmmm…. We lounged again by the pool and then headed home. Thank you Rog, Kel and Cam for making me feel so special. You guys ROCK.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Day in the Zone
So my friend Kel (the one pictured with Ace Young) invited us to Day on the Zone, including going back stage and meeting Nick Lachey, Ace Young, Daughtry and LifeHouse. Way too fun. I asked Nick if I could make a comment on his personal life (bad Diz) and he said it depends on the comment...so I said "Good move dumping the Blonde" (as you recall, he was married to Jessica Simpson). He started laughing and said "Yea, I think so too". What a freaking BLAST!
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Tea with the Ladies
Today, I went to tea with the ladies. We always have such a great time when we're together. Our ages vary, but our minds don't. We all work at the same place...well two retired, but we'll just pretend...and we all have different classifications and positions, but we mesh well together. I like that. We're not pretentious, snobby, etc. Just down to earth, tell it like it is, no fronting...etc.
We call each other on our bullshit, and just relax. I love it. They make the best chicken salad sandwiches there. I was never into them when I was younger. If you know me well enough, I despise mayonnaise, so if there's lots in it, I just can't stomach it. They make their sandwiches with substance, different flavors, etc. YUM!!! I swear, I have to learn how to make those. Anyway, I'm so blessed to have these ladies in my life. Just thought I'd give them a shout out and make the rest of you jealous with the pictures of the food!
I should be promoting the tea house so here goes... www.afternoontoremember.com. An Afternoon to Remember is located in Newcastle CA. For the full tea, we were served the cool strawberry soup, black forest ham quiche, 3 different finger sandwiches (almond chicken, cajun, and olive), 3 different desserts and 2 different scones. All very yummy. Check out their website and go. It's a very relaxing "girlie" time, so don't bring the husbands...bring the friends that you share great gossip with. You'll have a blast. Trust me!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Choosing to "Go Green" vs "Choosing Global Warming"
I gotta tell ya, this whole "Global Warming" BS certainly has me up in arms. The latest commercials do nothing to assuage the anger that I feel for the people in this world getting ripped off over the guise of "Global Warming". Why do politicians feel that we as a species are so powerful, that we can change the ebb and flow of the world, when we can't even come to terms with pettiness, strife, greed, etc. The scientific community is not in agreement that we're the cause of "Global Warming", but they do agree that the world...all on it's own...went thru various stages of cooling and warming. This is, of course, the same community that said we were "entering the next Ice Age" in the 70's.
Damn...in 30 short years, we've managed to Kick God's Ass to the curb, and take over the temperature of the planet.
Now, we're fed the pap of crap that if we "Don't go green, we're choosing Global Warming". Global Warming will happen with or without us, it is NOT a choice. However, if you choose to go green, that just means you're being more conscientious about the choices you make for our landfills, energy consumption, fossil fuel consumption, etc. It is not proven that one affects the other. We've got Al Gore (married to the infamous Tipper of PMRC fame, who was the pusher of music censorship) with more than 10 inconsistencies in his little "An Inconvenient Truth" movie, who is a huge fossil fuel consumer, trying to push effing Carbon Credits...like Carbon Credits will save the universe! These are two people who certainly belong together....A pusher of crap and a squasher of freedom!
Don't get me wrong people...I'm not saying that we shouldn't be greener about our choices. I think it's only wise that we look at our own consumption and be responsible about the choices we make. I am saying that I don't want to hear another effing thing about Going Green and Global Warming in the same sentence. I don't want to be treated like some stupid effing pod-person that needs the Government to tell me how to live, or fine me for using plastic. I am not giving up my airplane ride to Mexico for vacation because of the fuel it will use. However, I will pledge not to use my private airliner to deliver me to work everyday.
A little common sense is all I'm asking for here..... And that concludes my rant for the day!
Damn...in 30 short years, we've managed to Kick God's Ass to the curb, and take over the temperature of the planet.
Now, we're fed the pap of crap that if we "Don't go green, we're choosing Global Warming". Global Warming will happen with or without us, it is NOT a choice. However, if you choose to go green, that just means you're being more conscientious about the choices you make for our landfills, energy consumption, fossil fuel consumption, etc. It is not proven that one affects the other. We've got Al Gore (married to the infamous Tipper of PMRC fame, who was the pusher of music censorship) with more than 10 inconsistencies in his little "An Inconvenient Truth" movie, who is a huge fossil fuel consumer, trying to push effing Carbon Credits...like Carbon Credits will save the universe! These are two people who certainly belong together....A pusher of crap and a squasher of freedom!
Don't get me wrong people...I'm not saying that we shouldn't be greener about our choices. I think it's only wise that we look at our own consumption and be responsible about the choices we make. I am saying that I don't want to hear another effing thing about Going Green and Global Warming in the same sentence. I don't want to be treated like some stupid effing pod-person that needs the Government to tell me how to live, or fine me for using plastic. I am not giving up my airplane ride to Mexico for vacation because of the fuel it will use. However, I will pledge not to use my private airliner to deliver me to work everyday.
A little common sense is all I'm asking for here..... And that concludes my rant for the day!
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
I Need You Again My Friends!!!
Hey My Friends,
I have another friend who is suffering from cancer...another rare form. You came through for me with your prayers and the first friend is holding his own. Will you do it again for another friend?
This friend is someone my husband worked with. He's a fantastic guy who took us under his wing and guided us through the Sasco years at NEC Electronics. Always a warm smile and a generous heart, he's a guy who shares what he has. His wife is a pistol, lots of fun, vivacious smile and makes you feel comfortable being in her presence.
Life is never fair when horrible things happen to great people. I wish Kharma would kick in here, but unfortunately she's hiding her medusian head somewhere unmentionable and that is that. However, I have to believe that when bad things happen to good people, these are the very people who will find strength, love and endurance in their trials. These are the people that seem to attract family and friends that will support and love them through the rough times. These are the people who teach us all how to be more giving, more insightful and helps us prioritize our lives. These are the people who will make it!
So, I know I ask a lot of you and you keep returning the favors. Thanks for being my friend and supporting my friends with your prayers and good wishes.
I have another friend who is suffering from cancer...another rare form. You came through for me with your prayers and the first friend is holding his own. Will you do it again for another friend?
This friend is someone my husband worked with. He's a fantastic guy who took us under his wing and guided us through the Sasco years at NEC Electronics. Always a warm smile and a generous heart, he's a guy who shares what he has. His wife is a pistol, lots of fun, vivacious smile and makes you feel comfortable being in her presence.
Life is never fair when horrible things happen to great people. I wish Kharma would kick in here, but unfortunately she's hiding her medusian head somewhere unmentionable and that is that. However, I have to believe that when bad things happen to good people, these are the very people who will find strength, love and endurance in their trials. These are the people that seem to attract family and friends that will support and love them through the rough times. These are the people who teach us all how to be more giving, more insightful and helps us prioritize our lives. These are the people who will make it!
So, I know I ask a lot of you and you keep returning the favors. Thanks for being my friend and supporting my friends with your prayers and good wishes.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Monday, July 14, 2008
Collective Soul
So, we went to the Collective Soul concert. We had a great time. Rog was kind enough to drive (Congrats to Rog on his new job!) and we got there in no time. We ate the buffet dinner and the salad was good, salmon cooked to perfection, steak like rubber, etc. But the Margarita was splendid! I could feel it burning a trail to heaven all the way down my throat to my tummy..."Hello, old friend!". We had great seats and I got some great shots of the band.
The next day, I got rid of the Albatross around my neck. The trailer has been sold. Anywho, here's some shots for ya. Ok..still problems uploading. We'll try again tomorrow.
The next day, I got rid of the Albatross around my neck. The trailer has been sold. Anywho, here's some shots for ya. Ok..still problems uploading. We'll try again tomorrow.
Friday, July 4, 2008
4th of July
"On this day of Independence, On this Independence Day..." Just want to say thank you to our troops who fight for our freedom every day. Thank you to our Veteran's who have fought and understand the true meaning of the term "Freedom is not free". Thank you to our internal heroes, the police, firefighters, doctors and nurses and volunteers. You make life in our country enjoyable.
Thank you to the parents of the aforementioned heroes. You are heroes too. You watch your children go out and fight the noble fight...never knowing, but always hoping they come back safe. And for those parents who's children did not come back...a special thank you. Thank you for the courage to let your children out into the world and the courage of your children to fight the good fight. Thank you and your children for the ultimate sacrifice. For me, you are the meaning of the word "Freedom". All of you embody what this country is about.
It is not about race or religion, but the body collective. It is about all of us, indivisible. Our Flag and our National Anthem is for each and every citizen of this country. It should mean the same to all of us. Our country is young, our country has made mistakes, and will continue to do so in it's evolution. It is up to each and everyone of us to rise above the petty injustices and embrace the destiny of this country. To do otherwise will divide us. To do otherwise, may cost us the very freedom that we've paid, and continue to pay, so dearly for.
Thank you to the parents of the aforementioned heroes. You are heroes too. You watch your children go out and fight the noble fight...never knowing, but always hoping they come back safe. And for those parents who's children did not come back...a special thank you. Thank you for the courage to let your children out into the world and the courage of your children to fight the good fight. Thank you and your children for the ultimate sacrifice. For me, you are the meaning of the word "Freedom". All of you embody what this country is about.
It is not about race or religion, but the body collective. It is about all of us, indivisible. Our Flag and our National Anthem is for each and every citizen of this country. It should mean the same to all of us. Our country is young, our country has made mistakes, and will continue to do so in it's evolution. It is up to each and everyone of us to rise above the petty injustices and embrace the destiny of this country. To do otherwise will divide us. To do otherwise, may cost us the very freedom that we've paid, and continue to pay, so dearly for.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Foolish Decisions
So I have a very naive friend who married someone she shouldn't have. She basically "settled" because (I believe) she was lonely. Before married this guy, I asked her to get a pre-nup because she was a single parent homeowner and I said that the home was her daughter's inheritance or security. She said that because of her religion, she didn't believe in that. Me and my other friend begged her to reconsider marrying this guy because he didn't have a steady job, was boarding with friends (no appt of his own), and seemed to have issues. She did it anyway.
Today, I found out that she's selling her home on a short-sale due to her debts and borrowing against the equity of the house. She was financially fine before she married this idiot. He suffers from depression and health issues and can't always work, but it seems he can spend her money. I almost puked when I heard the news. She had to start all over after her divorce, now she has to start all over again.
Ladies, I wouldn't call myself a "Women's Libber", but for God's sake, a woman should be smart enough to cover her back...just in case. This is not an age when you can depend on the man! If you can, and have a husband/significant other that shares equally in the relationship, great! But always have a back up plan! What if your partner dies? What if your partner blindsides you with "I've found someone else", what if your partner makes unwise financial decisions without you? What are you going to do? PLEASE, please think about your future and prepare yourself, prepare your finances, make sure you are pro-active about your retirement planning and funds. That way, if some unforeseen thing happens to your loved one, you can pick up the slack and survive. This is so important if you have children. No one else is going to take care of them for you. You have to make sure your babies are safe, fed, clothed, etc. Have your own account and save some money for a rainy day, because.....
THE RAIN WILL COME! Don't kid yourself that it won't. Life is life. Be prepared.
Ok...sorry I sound so preachy. I'm just sick over my friend's dilemma. There's nothing I can do or say but be a supportive friend, but this is going to be keeping me up at night.
Today, I found out that she's selling her home on a short-sale due to her debts and borrowing against the equity of the house. She was financially fine before she married this idiot. He suffers from depression and health issues and can't always work, but it seems he can spend her money. I almost puked when I heard the news. She had to start all over after her divorce, now she has to start all over again.
Ladies, I wouldn't call myself a "Women's Libber", but for God's sake, a woman should be smart enough to cover her back...just in case. This is not an age when you can depend on the man! If you can, and have a husband/significant other that shares equally in the relationship, great! But always have a back up plan! What if your partner dies? What if your partner blindsides you with "I've found someone else", what if your partner makes unwise financial decisions without you? What are you going to do? PLEASE, please think about your future and prepare yourself, prepare your finances, make sure you are pro-active about your retirement planning and funds. That way, if some unforeseen thing happens to your loved one, you can pick up the slack and survive. This is so important if you have children. No one else is going to take care of them for you. You have to make sure your babies are safe, fed, clothed, etc. Have your own account and save some money for a rainy day, because.....
THE RAIN WILL COME! Don't kid yourself that it won't. Life is life. Be prepared.
Ok...sorry I sound so preachy. I'm just sick over my friend's dilemma. There's nothing I can do or say but be a supportive friend, but this is going to be keeping me up at night.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Insidious Comments
So I'm pissed because the husband threw out one of his "insidious" comments yesterday. I hate it when he does that. It bothers me because it's the second one in a week.
Last week, as I'm going off to bed he throws out "I guess you're not going to lock up, so I'll have to do it". I was pissed! I spun around and said, "if you're asking me to lock up the house then come out and ask me! The reason I don't lock up the house when I go to bed is because I go to bed earlier than you do (sometime between 8 and 9 pm) and sometimes you don't bring your sorry ass to bed until around 11. If you want me to lock up early, then just say so, otherwise, it's the responsibility of the last one in bed!" and stomped off to bed.
Last night he threw something out about watering the plants...he can never come out and just ask, he makes it sound like I'm such a fucking loser that I never do anything around the house and it's such a burden for me. So at the moment, we're not speaking much. I'm still heated about it and I'm not going to stand for these kinds of comments much more. It's like a knife in the back thing. I like to fight fair and head on. If I have a problem with you, I'm gonna come out and say it...not pussyfoot around. Ah well....and this too shall pass.
Last week, as I'm going off to bed he throws out "I guess you're not going to lock up, so I'll have to do it". I was pissed! I spun around and said, "if you're asking me to lock up the house then come out and ask me! The reason I don't lock up the house when I go to bed is because I go to bed earlier than you do (sometime between 8 and 9 pm) and sometimes you don't bring your sorry ass to bed until around 11. If you want me to lock up early, then just say so, otherwise, it's the responsibility of the last one in bed!" and stomped off to bed.
Last night he threw something out about watering the plants...he can never come out and just ask, he makes it sound like I'm such a fucking loser that I never do anything around the house and it's such a burden for me. So at the moment, we're not speaking much. I'm still heated about it and I'm not going to stand for these kinds of comments much more. It's like a knife in the back thing. I like to fight fair and head on. If I have a problem with you, I'm gonna come out and say it...not pussyfoot around. Ah well....and this too shall pass.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Troubled Times
I read the news today, oh boy…..
These are sad times. I read 4 different articles on abused, tortured and killed children. A man kicked and stomped his 2 year old to death…a woman and her friend repeatedly abused her 5 year old son, including forcing him to put his open hands on a stove burner. His hands were so scarred that he couldn’t open them fully….A Aunt/foster mother was arrested for killing her 4 year old niece…I just cried, literally had tears rolling down my cheeks.
When I found out that we could not have children of our own, I was devastated. However, I got another chance due to circumstances to be a Mom to my Nephew, now my son. I cannot fathom how effing animals can do these unspeakable things to children. I gaze in my Nieces eyes and see the innocence and love there and the thought of betraying that love sickens me. My Nephew came with a lot of baggage from being abused by his Dad. It takes everything in my power to stay on an even keel and not do something that I’ll pay for the rest of my life.
How do we, as a society, tolerate this animalistic behavior? How do we keep our babies safe? There are predators everywhere..some we’re related to, that want to harm our children. It scares me that I won’t be able to protect my own, let alone all of the defenseless babies out there. My heart bleeds to think that while I’m writing this another child is suffering. I can’t see my screen now. I have to stop.
These are sad times. I read 4 different articles on abused, tortured and killed children. A man kicked and stomped his 2 year old to death…a woman and her friend repeatedly abused her 5 year old son, including forcing him to put his open hands on a stove burner. His hands were so scarred that he couldn’t open them fully….A Aunt/foster mother was arrested for killing her 4 year old niece…I just cried, literally had tears rolling down my cheeks.
When I found out that we could not have children of our own, I was devastated. However, I got another chance due to circumstances to be a Mom to my Nephew, now my son. I cannot fathom how effing animals can do these unspeakable things to children. I gaze in my Nieces eyes and see the innocence and love there and the thought of betraying that love sickens me. My Nephew came with a lot of baggage from being abused by his Dad. It takes everything in my power to stay on an even keel and not do something that I’ll pay for the rest of my life.
How do we, as a society, tolerate this animalistic behavior? How do we keep our babies safe? There are predators everywhere..some we’re related to, that want to harm our children. It scares me that I won’t be able to protect my own, let alone all of the defenseless babies out there. My heart bleeds to think that while I’m writing this another child is suffering. I can’t see my screen now. I have to stop.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Whazzup!!!
Doing a little slacking on the blogging. Bad Diz! Yesterday my Cousin and I did some celebrating of her birthday. Too fun. We shopped, had lunch, shopped some more and I got to meet her new family. It was cool! The older we get, the more I come to appreciate her.
It's Father's Day, and although I don't have a dad of my own, my Father-in-law "Dad" is a good man. He has his faults, like all of us do, but he has a heart of gold. He doesn't always say things in the accepted way, but he's real. He's a self-made man, a military man, had his own business and recently retired. He's self educated and when there's something he doesn't know, he makes sure to find out. He slaughters my name, but that's his term of endearment. It used to bug me, but now I like it, and would miss it if I didn't hear it from him. He likes the same kind of movies I do, and we share a love of one particular one called "Return to Me" starring Minnie Driver and David Duchovny. If you haven't seen it and love romantic movies...this is a keeper.
He's as hard-headed as I am, and sometimes we go toe-to-toe. That's ok though. It makes the relationship stronger. Happy Father's Day Dad!
I got a little something for the husband too. He says "I'm not your Dad". I said "You're Dad to our kid, so I'm thanking you for being a good Dad to him". This logic of my husband's is the reason I did not get a Mother's day card or gift from him. Though it does sting momentarily, I don't let it get to me, cuz that's how he is, and I recognize that. Sometimes, he's too damned logical.
My husband is a rare breed of guy. If you know the circumstances of how our son came to be in our lives, you know that this is a job that he volunteered for because he loves me and adores Damian. He always has. He embraced fatherhood and enjoys every moment. He's been challenged, as all parents have, but he comes thru. Thanks for being a great Dad Muffin. I sure appreciate it and you.
It's Father's Day, and although I don't have a dad of my own, my Father-in-law "Dad" is a good man. He has his faults, like all of us do, but he has a heart of gold. He doesn't always say things in the accepted way, but he's real. He's a self-made man, a military man, had his own business and recently retired. He's self educated and when there's something he doesn't know, he makes sure to find out. He slaughters my name, but that's his term of endearment. It used to bug me, but now I like it, and would miss it if I didn't hear it from him. He likes the same kind of movies I do, and we share a love of one particular one called "Return to Me" starring Minnie Driver and David Duchovny. If you haven't seen it and love romantic movies...this is a keeper.
He's as hard-headed as I am, and sometimes we go toe-to-toe. That's ok though. It makes the relationship stronger. Happy Father's Day Dad!
I got a little something for the husband too. He says "I'm not your Dad". I said "You're Dad to our kid, so I'm thanking you for being a good Dad to him". This logic of my husband's is the reason I did not get a Mother's day card or gift from him. Though it does sting momentarily, I don't let it get to me, cuz that's how he is, and I recognize that. Sometimes, he's too damned logical.
My husband is a rare breed of guy. If you know the circumstances of how our son came to be in our lives, you know that this is a job that he volunteered for because he loves me and adores Damian. He always has. He embraced fatherhood and enjoys every moment. He's been challenged, as all parents have, but he comes thru. Thanks for being a great Dad Muffin. I sure appreciate it and you.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Oh Happy Day....
Well, looks like I've sold the trailer in Clear Lake...THANK YOU JESUS!!! What a drain on my finances and it chaps my butt. My Mom's friend is going to buy it off of me, and I'm giving her a deal. I just don't want the hassle anymore. She's a standup lady and I did promise her first crack at it.
Besides, I'd rather torch the place then let the owners of the trailer park have it. That BEOCH can kiss my @#$%*(^$!@@%@^%&& ASS!
Ok..I go nighty night now. Dizzy is tired, cranky but happy too. Dizzy talk tomorrow.
Besides, I'd rather torch the place then let the owners of the trailer park have it. That BEOCH can kiss my @#$%*(^$!@@%@^%&& ASS!
Ok..I go nighty night now. Dizzy is tired, cranky but happy too. Dizzy talk tomorrow.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Regrets
So something is on my mind that's been bothering me. I learned a hard lesson. When Serenie Beanie came to visit a couple of weekends ago, we had rainy weather. She wanted to go for a walk in the rain and when I couldn't find an umbrella, I nixed the idea...thinking that it would be best if she didn't get wet.
What the eff was I thinking??? I keep replaying that in my mind, and I should've taken her walking in the rain. I love to walk in the rain, and get wet...stick my tongue out for the raindrops to fall on. I missed a moment that we could've shared forever and it's gone. The ache in my heart over missing this moment is huge. I keep thinking about it and wishing over and over that I could go back in time and change it. She probably won't remember, and when the opportunity comes again, I won't miss it, but...
Something in my heart hurts.
What the eff was I thinking??? I keep replaying that in my mind, and I should've taken her walking in the rain. I love to walk in the rain, and get wet...stick my tongue out for the raindrops to fall on. I missed a moment that we could've shared forever and it's gone. The ache in my heart over missing this moment is huge. I keep thinking about it and wishing over and over that I could go back in time and change it. She probably won't remember, and when the opportunity comes again, I won't miss it, but...
Something in my heart hurts.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Spoke Too Soon...Kinda
Ok, I watched Steve Jobs address to the developer industry last night...after my blog, and maybe I reacted a little unfairly. There are some really kewl new things about the latest rendition of the iPhone. However, I still believe that they could've given more capacity to the phone...especially since the iPod Touch goes to 32 gigs. It's only a matter of time (Christmas) that the iPhone will too.
However, the Man says that he wants to upgrade his phone and is interested in my Treo 750. I'm pretty sure I can transfer my options to his phone number...along with the phone. So I may end up getting the new iPhone in July. He wants something to text easily on, and this may be the way to get him into the technology age. God knows, his mom got him a cool P.C. laptop as a gift about 3 years back and I can count on one hand how many times he's used it.
If this is the way to get him more teckkie, then I'm all for spending $300 for the new phone.
However, the Man says that he wants to upgrade his phone and is interested in my Treo 750. I'm pretty sure I can transfer my options to his phone number...along with the phone. So I may end up getting the new iPhone in July. He wants something to text easily on, and this may be the way to get him into the technology age. God knows, his mom got him a cool P.C. laptop as a gift about 3 years back and I can count on one hand how many times he's used it.
If this is the way to get him more teckkie, then I'm all for spending $300 for the new phone.
Monday, June 9, 2008
Disappointed
Apple came out with their phone, but it only goes to 16 gigs. What up with that? I know technology is capable of more. I've waited a year for more capacity...and this is what I get? Diz is not happy. Diz believes her beloved company has let her down. Diz is disappointed.
It does have some nice bells and whistles, but not what I was expecting. Am I expecting too much from Apple? I don't know. You go check it out and tell me....www.apple.com
It does have some nice bells and whistles, but not what I was expecting. Am I expecting too much from Apple? I don't know. You go check it out and tell me....www.apple.com
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Jawbone - By Aliph
So the new "Hands Free" cell phone law goes into effect in California in a couple of weeks. I've always been a earpiece user, and the last one I had was a "Jawbone". Loved it, but the ear loop was a little flaky and it didn't want to stay securely in my ear. However, this is the first earpiece I've used that everyone could hear me clearly on. It has military technology and you can be in a stiff wind and the person on the other end won't hear it...LOVED IT. However, I lost it (I never lose my techie gadget stuff) when I was assisting my husband out of the hospital from is Knee surgery. Very Upset.
So I didn't replace it right away, although I missed it sorely. In March, I wrote an email to Aliph, who makes Jawbone, and asked if they're coming out with another version due to the issues I had with the old one. I got an email back saying "No, there are no plans to update the Jawbone". Still, I held off, for some reason. Well, everytime I've updated my Mac from Apple, a new one comes out the next month...pisses me off. Why can't they just tell me to wait till next month? Same with effing software, I upgrade, and here comes the new version. So I waited...
Thank God I did. They just came out with Jawbone II which is 50 percent smaller and fits like a glove. Bought it yesterday...WooHoo. Although I'm still pissed off about the damned denial! Something tells me I'll love this one...and hang on to it! Now for the new iPhone release! Rumor is tomorrow, but we'll see....
So I didn't replace it right away, although I missed it sorely. In March, I wrote an email to Aliph, who makes Jawbone, and asked if they're coming out with another version due to the issues I had with the old one. I got an email back saying "No, there are no plans to update the Jawbone". Still, I held off, for some reason. Well, everytime I've updated my Mac from Apple, a new one comes out the next month...pisses me off. Why can't they just tell me to wait till next month? Same with effing software, I upgrade, and here comes the new version. So I waited...
Thank God I did. They just came out with Jawbone II which is 50 percent smaller and fits like a glove. Bought it yesterday...WooHoo. Although I'm still pissed off about the damned denial! Something tells me I'll love this one...and hang on to it! Now for the new iPhone release! Rumor is tomorrow, but we'll see....
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Timeshare..Love Em or Hate Em?
I've had a timeshare now since 1995. I've generally loved the timeshare and the fact that it forces you to have a vacation. I've been to places that I probably wouldn't have gone to without it, so I'm extremely lucky. What bothers me is their billing department.
Before a couple of years ago, I paid the dues on a quarterly basis. For about 5 payments straight, they would harass me with notices saying I hadn't paid it and I would call, give the check number and they would find that they've applied the payment to the original loan balance and have to move it. I would get apologies, but it doesn't stop the feelings you get when this happens. We paid off the loan and decided to add more credits to our account, which meant a new loan and increased dues. They changed their policy and now take the payments from your account monthly. I said that this was fine, as long as they don't send me any more notices.
Well, in trying to reserve the timeshare the other day, they said that I had an outstanding due payment of $400+. I asked how that was possible? They wanted to know what I meant. I said, You take the money out of my account every month, how could you manage to screw it up that much? And the fight ensued!
Turns out they said that when I increased my credits last year that one payment was missed for August. I told them my bank statement shows that it was made. Then they said that it didn't show the increase, I said that there's a separate payment for that one the statement. The other costs was penalties and interest. I had to fax in my bank statement showing otherwise. Still haven't heard from them.
What's the point of having a vacation timeshare when all it does is stress you out?
Before a couple of years ago, I paid the dues on a quarterly basis. For about 5 payments straight, they would harass me with notices saying I hadn't paid it and I would call, give the check number and they would find that they've applied the payment to the original loan balance and have to move it. I would get apologies, but it doesn't stop the feelings you get when this happens. We paid off the loan and decided to add more credits to our account, which meant a new loan and increased dues. They changed their policy and now take the payments from your account monthly. I said that this was fine, as long as they don't send me any more notices.
Well, in trying to reserve the timeshare the other day, they said that I had an outstanding due payment of $400+. I asked how that was possible? They wanted to know what I meant. I said, You take the money out of my account every month, how could you manage to screw it up that much? And the fight ensued!
Turns out they said that when I increased my credits last year that one payment was missed for August. I told them my bank statement shows that it was made. Then they said that it didn't show the increase, I said that there's a separate payment for that one the statement. The other costs was penalties and interest. I had to fax in my bank statement showing otherwise. Still haven't heard from them.
What's the point of having a vacation timeshare when all it does is stress you out?
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Memorial Day
Memorial Day (American) is a day when we remember all of our heroes who have fallen during our wars supporting our freedoms. It’s a day that is celebrated in different ways throughout our Country. I think if you ask people, it means different things that encircle the fallen ones. Some of us have family who perished, some have family that serve or have served, some people just like to picnic with family.
In these desperate times, the underlying theme for me is sacrifice for freedom. I like to think of all the freedoms I enjoy that those who have fallen have bought for me with their lives. Freedom of speech is a huge thing for me. The freedom to blog and tell you how I feel, or not feel. I wonder if the young bloggers of today give a thought to that. Many of them think of it as their right and don’t give it a second thought. They don’t think of it as a privilege that was purchased for them by the blood of others.
Do Americans hold dear the thoughts of mothers who have lost their babies (no matter what age, they will always be their mother’s babies) who fought for our freedoms? Do we remember the fathers who grieve silently so they can be strong for their wives? Do we fill our hearts with the thought of sisters and brothers who are missing their siblings and remembering days when they played together in sunshine and happiness?
I won’t go into a political diatribe as to whether or not we should be at war. The bottom line is, we are at war. Our soldiers have spilled their precious blood in service to their country…to us. It is important for us to remember the price of freedom. The price was the same in 1776 as it is today. What is the price?
The price of our freedom is blood, pain, loss, lives, hearts, souls and sacrifices of those who have fallen….and for us. A fallen soldier means a piece of us has died. If we hold this in our hearts and appreciate what we have, then our heroes have not died in vain. Remember, not just on Memorial Day, but anytime you think about it, close your eyes, offer up a prayer to heaven, and ask God to take care of all of our soldiers, fallen or otherwise, and to watch over their families and our Nation.
In these desperate times, the underlying theme for me is sacrifice for freedom. I like to think of all the freedoms I enjoy that those who have fallen have bought for me with their lives. Freedom of speech is a huge thing for me. The freedom to blog and tell you how I feel, or not feel. I wonder if the young bloggers of today give a thought to that. Many of them think of it as their right and don’t give it a second thought. They don’t think of it as a privilege that was purchased for them by the blood of others.
Do Americans hold dear the thoughts of mothers who have lost their babies (no matter what age, they will always be their mother’s babies) who fought for our freedoms? Do we remember the fathers who grieve silently so they can be strong for their wives? Do we fill our hearts with the thought of sisters and brothers who are missing their siblings and remembering days when they played together in sunshine and happiness?
I won’t go into a political diatribe as to whether or not we should be at war. The bottom line is, we are at war. Our soldiers have spilled their precious blood in service to their country…to us. It is important for us to remember the price of freedom. The price was the same in 1776 as it is today. What is the price?
The price of our freedom is blood, pain, loss, lives, hearts, souls and sacrifices of those who have fallen….and for us. A fallen soldier means a piece of us has died. If we hold this in our hearts and appreciate what we have, then our heroes have not died in vain. Remember, not just on Memorial Day, but anytime you think about it, close your eyes, offer up a prayer to heaven, and ask God to take care of all of our soldiers, fallen or otherwise, and to watch over their families and our Nation.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Retirement Parties...Oh My!
So yesterday afternoon I attended an awesome retirement party. It’s really fun to be around the people you work with in a totally different environment. You can find the party animals, the girls that get a little too tipsy, the cool guys, and an atmosphere that is relaxing. I generally have a rule about partying with the people I work with….with the exception of a select few, I stick to one drink, nurse it for ages, and then go home.
I stuck to that rule yesterday. Today in the office, we all had a laugh over the people who “lost it”. The things they said and did, etc. This is usually stuff that will get pulled out at the wrong time, when you need to have your game-face about you and then…someone tries to ruin it. Fortunately for me, not a problem.
I also got to know our LANWAN guys better. They are so much fun, open, and they offered to buy me drinks. Can’t go wrong with that…too bad I had to refuse. They also said that I looked much younger than my years…SCORE!!! Ok, so they lied to me, it sure felt good going in my ears…know what I mean? I did have to dispense some “elderly wisdom” though. Apparently 3 of them are dating girls from work…and my philosophy is…you don’t piss in your pond. It’s rare that it doesn’t come back to bite you. If the relationship goes sour, everyone knows about it and is all up in your business. Ah well, the impetuousness of youth. I must be a really jealous bitch.
I stuck to that rule yesterday. Today in the office, we all had a laugh over the people who “lost it”. The things they said and did, etc. This is usually stuff that will get pulled out at the wrong time, when you need to have your game-face about you and then…someone tries to ruin it. Fortunately for me, not a problem.
I also got to know our LANWAN guys better. They are so much fun, open, and they offered to buy me drinks. Can’t go wrong with that…too bad I had to refuse. They also said that I looked much younger than my years…SCORE!!! Ok, so they lied to me, it sure felt good going in my ears…know what I mean? I did have to dispense some “elderly wisdom” though. Apparently 3 of them are dating girls from work…and my philosophy is…you don’t piss in your pond. It’s rare that it doesn’t come back to bite you. If the relationship goes sour, everyone knows about it and is all up in your business. Ah well, the impetuousness of youth. I must be a really jealous bitch.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
What a Day...
So I'm lying in bed last night and felt something bite my right arm just above the elbow. I grabbed my arm and rubbed it and went back to sleep. When I got up this morning, I could still feel the bite so I went to the mirror and looked. I didn't see anything but my pudgy arm. Then I looked at my left arm and noticed that it wasn't really pudgy at all...I realized that my arm was swollen, but I've lost weight and didn't realized that my arms had changed. I started laughing. It made the bite funny. It's still a little sore, but I'm not going to worry about it.
I'm feeling better from the raking also. Didn't do the stair machine this morning, but after my body loosened up today, did it this afternoon. It was hard getting up from chairs because inactivity made my side hurt more. Middle age sucks sometimes! It's all good though.
I'm feeling better from the raking also. Didn't do the stair machine this morning, but after my body loosened up today, did it this afternoon. It was hard getting up from chairs because inactivity made my side hurt more. Middle age sucks sometimes! It's all good though.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Sore!!!
Well, this weekend's raking has done a number on me. My legs and arms are fine, but one side hurts and is sore. I'm getting up like an old lady, instead of a middle aged one. What's a girl to do.
I had fun on my weekend without the husband. Went to tea with girlies, rented a chickflick...P.S. I love you. Ended up buying the soundtrack off of iTunes. Things went well.
I had fun on my weekend without the husband. Went to tea with girlies, rented a chickflick...P.S. I love you. Ended up buying the soundtrack off of iTunes. Things went well.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Freedom!!!
So the man is going to be gone all weekend. He’ll leave early Saturday morning, and return on Monday afternoon. The boys are headed to Eagle Lake to open up the summer house and have a great time. This, of course, leaves me to my own devices. Hmmm, what to do??? Eat bonbons, watch chick-flicks??
Tomorrow is Tea Day with the Ladies. There was going to be 8 of us, but 3 backed out. Wish I could be mad, but they all had solid reasons. I'll just miss them there. I roll with some righteous chicks. They're strong, independent, persevering, and funny as hell. Not quite sure how I got to hang with them. I know I'm extremely lucky. Most of them are older than me and I pay attention to what they say. However, I feel like we're all the same age, and when we get together, I never feel the age gap between us.
I'll also do some raking of leaves so the man won't have to worry about it and come home feeling rested. Sunday I'll rake some leaves in the morning and do some exercising. Vacuum, and then the rest of the day is mine. WooHoo.
Tomorrow is Tea Day with the Ladies. There was going to be 8 of us, but 3 backed out. Wish I could be mad, but they all had solid reasons. I'll just miss them there. I roll with some righteous chicks. They're strong, independent, persevering, and funny as hell. Not quite sure how I got to hang with them. I know I'm extremely lucky. Most of them are older than me and I pay attention to what they say. However, I feel like we're all the same age, and when we get together, I never feel the age gap between us.
I'll also do some raking of leaves so the man won't have to worry about it and come home feeling rested. Sunday I'll rake some leaves in the morning and do some exercising. Vacuum, and then the rest of the day is mine. WooHoo.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
BIANCA AND TWINS!!!
Today, I got to see my friend Bianca and her sisters, twins Sydney and Peyton. It's been awhile since I sang a song to Bianca. I think I need to remember to do that. She used to leave me awesome songs on my work machine and stuff.
The twins did "High Fives", shared raisins and were just plain cute!!! Bianca has grown into a beautiful young lady. I think her Dad had better get a shotgun to clean when her dates come over to pick her up. Maybe I'll just have to let him borrow one. I can tell she's going to be popular with the boys. With a little luck, she'll stay into sports and remember that boys have COOTIES!!!
Thanks for bringing the girls to work KristieGirl. I sure enjoyed the visit.
The twins did "High Fives", shared raisins and were just plain cute!!! Bianca has grown into a beautiful young lady. I think her Dad had better get a shotgun to clean when her dates come over to pick her up. Maybe I'll just have to let him borrow one. I can tell she's going to be popular with the boys. With a little luck, she'll stay into sports and remember that boys have COOTIES!!!
Thanks for bringing the girls to work KristieGirl. I sure enjoyed the visit.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
The Love of a Good Man
I came home today and my man had the garage open and the fan going...knowing I'd be exercising. My man is an alcoholic and a procrastinator. However, he works hard at keeping his addiction at bay. I am a slob. I have a boy gene inside me that detests housework, but loves to tinker with cars and be outside. I think I have the better end of the deal. I have ways of dealing with the procrastination, so it's not too bad of a thing.
He, however, does his own laundry and cooks. I love to cook, but laundry? YUK! He loves me. He tells me all the time how beautiful I am, no matter how fat I get. I wonder when the spell will wear off (I'm sure FairyGodmother had something to do with this) but it never seems to. He does little things to show me he loves me. He forgets the big things...like Mother's day, etc. But I'll see contstant reminders that he does...like stocking the freezer with my favorite South beach lunchables, or buying SkinnyCow ice cream sandwiches.
He is a good man...and I'm lucky enough to have his love. Stay tuned till tomorrow, when, for some reason, I'll be so mad at him that I'll want to shoot him and bury him under the house. Just kidding.
He, however, does his own laundry and cooks. I love to cook, but laundry? YUK! He loves me. He tells me all the time how beautiful I am, no matter how fat I get. I wonder when the spell will wear off (I'm sure FairyGodmother had something to do with this) but it never seems to. He does little things to show me he loves me. He forgets the big things...like Mother's day, etc. But I'll see contstant reminders that he does...like stocking the freezer with my favorite South beach lunchables, or buying SkinnyCow ice cream sandwiches.
He is a good man...and I'm lucky enough to have his love. Stay tuned till tomorrow, when, for some reason, I'll be so mad at him that I'll want to shoot him and bury him under the house. Just kidding.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Teensy
She's a great friend and I worry about her. She's under such stress and she keeps a brave face. She's shouldering the weight of the world and yet still remembers to ask how I'm doing, or bring me a recipe. She treasures her children and grandchildren. I hope they know how much she talks about them all, how her eyes sparkle when she mentions their accomplishments, Heather and her job, Chris working hard in school, Georgine raising her beautiful daughters and doing a great job juggling teaching and mommyhood, Brandon rocking the world of Apple.
She worries about her man and the hardships he's going thru and is a rock for him. She pays attention to details so they can be used for his recovery. She is love and it surrounds her, permeates the air, and infects the people she cares about. Yes Teensy. I see you. I feel you. You are not alone. You may never read this (you're not a blog reader), but your friends have built a web around you and sense the turmoil you're in. We will always try to relieve the pressure, comfort you, sustain you and love you, just as you do for the ones around you.
She worries about her man and the hardships he's going thru and is a rock for him. She pays attention to details so they can be used for his recovery. She is love and it surrounds her, permeates the air, and infects the people she cares about. Yes Teensy. I see you. I feel you. You are not alone. You may never read this (you're not a blog reader), but your friends have built a web around you and sense the turmoil you're in. We will always try to relieve the pressure, comfort you, sustain you and love you, just as you do for the ones around you.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Parents Again
One thing I notice, being a member of the Booster club for the local high school, is that many parents do not participate in any of their kids school activities. You have to beg to have participation to help out at the snack shack for games, or stuff envelopes, or whatever. I find it amazing that parents can't devote 10 measley hours of their month to the extra curricular activities of their kids. Why is that? What is the priority?
Maybe I feel differently because we couldn't have children. I do have a son, and although we adopted him at an older age, when the opportunity came to be involved in his school activities, we moved heaven and earth to do so. One of us was always at his little league games, we attended back to school and open house, we chaperoned trips, we didn't want to miss out of a second of his school years because we knew there would come a day (like now) where we'd be shut out due to his growth and life choices. I don't regret ever blowing off work to participate in his school days. I miss those days horribly. I can still see him looking to see if we're there and catching our eyes, smiling and then focusing on whatever it was he was doing. He needed to know we were there in some way.
I so wish there was a way to communicate to these parents that "these are the days of their lives" to quote a Queen song. Don't let them slip through your fingers. Get involved in the Booster club and school activities and what your kid is doing. For God sake, make sure to read your kids "My Space" page and know that they're involved in. Don't let the one precious thing you have slip thru your fingers. Money comes and goes, homes are bought, sold, lost, jobs can be replaced...but that first home run, the shared feeling of wining or losing a game, the feeling your child gets taking you to each of his classes for open house...you can't get that back. Once it's done...it's gone forever.
Maybe I feel differently because we couldn't have children. I do have a son, and although we adopted him at an older age, when the opportunity came to be involved in his school activities, we moved heaven and earth to do so. One of us was always at his little league games, we attended back to school and open house, we chaperoned trips, we didn't want to miss out of a second of his school years because we knew there would come a day (like now) where we'd be shut out due to his growth and life choices. I don't regret ever blowing off work to participate in his school days. I miss those days horribly. I can still see him looking to see if we're there and catching our eyes, smiling and then focusing on whatever it was he was doing. He needed to know we were there in some way.
I so wish there was a way to communicate to these parents that "these are the days of their lives" to quote a Queen song. Don't let them slip through your fingers. Get involved in the Booster club and school activities and what your kid is doing. For God sake, make sure to read your kids "My Space" page and know that they're involved in. Don't let the one precious thing you have slip thru your fingers. Money comes and goes, homes are bought, sold, lost, jobs can be replaced...but that first home run, the shared feeling of wining or losing a game, the feeling your child gets taking you to each of his classes for open house...you can't get that back. Once it's done...it's gone forever.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Dirty Underwear
So I had a busy day yesterday. I got up early and exercised. Went to my friend's graduation, and lunch. Went to our friends for dinner and off to the soap derby races. I brought a change of clothes for the pool and for the races. When I changed for the pool , I wrapped my underwear in my green skirt and put it in my bag. When I dressed for the races, I had on an exercise skirt that comes with pants. I forgot to bring a fresh pair of knickers so I went commando.
When I got home and went thru the bag this morning, I can't seem to find the skirt with the undies wrapped in them. I'm totally mortified that they'll be found at my friends...which they will be. Nothing like leaving your dirty skivvies around for others to find. Ah well..I knew ya'll needed a laugh on Mother's day, so here you go. Yes...Diz leaves dirty skivvies at her friends house!!!
On a great note, I heard from the boy today. He's feeling better and doing well. I miss him. It's always great to hear his voice and those feelings of joy and longing bubble up uncontrollably. He may irk me terribly, but he's a good boy and I love him so much it hurts.
Happy Mother's day to all of you Mom's. A special Happy Mother's Day to those Mom's who's babies are overseas fighting for our country, or stationed far away from home. Also to those Mom's who's babies have been taken by the Lord. No matter where your babies are, it is your day...and I know they are thinking of you and loving you with all of their hearts!
When I got home and went thru the bag this morning, I can't seem to find the skirt with the undies wrapped in them. I'm totally mortified that they'll be found at my friends...which they will be. Nothing like leaving your dirty skivvies around for others to find. Ah well..I knew ya'll needed a laugh on Mother's day, so here you go. Yes...Diz leaves dirty skivvies at her friends house!!!
On a great note, I heard from the boy today. He's feeling better and doing well. I miss him. It's always great to hear his voice and those feelings of joy and longing bubble up uncontrollably. He may irk me terribly, but he's a good boy and I love him so much it hurts.
Happy Mother's day to all of you Mom's. A special Happy Mother's Day to those Mom's who's babies are overseas fighting for our country, or stationed far away from home. Also to those Mom's who's babies have been taken by the Lord. No matter where your babies are, it is your day...and I know they are thinking of you and loving you with all of their hearts!
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Retirement
We had a retirement potluck today at work. I gotta tell ya, I'm not due to retire for another 14 years (If I retire at 55) however, most of my closest friends are retiring within the next year, 2 years on the outside. I'm jealous as hell because I'll miss spending time with them. But I'm also jealous because I know they'll be doing fun things like going to tea, shopping and heading to Vegas for some fun.
I'm sure I'll be able to attend a few of those things, but I know I'll be missing out on the majority. I can hear it now..."Diz..we're headed to Vegas for a mid-week special. Can you go?" "No??? Too bad...SUCKER..I mean Diz."
And I'll be swearing under my breath..."Those no good dirtbag Beoches did that sh#t on purpose! @#$$%^$#^@^"
Ah well, they know I'll love them anyway, but that doesn't mean that envy won't cop a squat in my chest and make me writhe in jealousy, wasting away the last vestiges of goodness that I've managed to horde these past 43 years. Oh wait...I think I pissed the last of the goodness away when I wished bad mojo to the AntiChrist. Perhaps there's no hope...or help for me after all.
I'm sure I'll be able to attend a few of those things, but I know I'll be missing out on the majority. I can hear it now..."Diz..we're headed to Vegas for a mid-week special. Can you go?" "No??? Too bad...SUCKER..I mean Diz."
And I'll be swearing under my breath..."Those no good dirtbag Beoches did that sh#t on purpose! @#$$%^$#^@^"
Ah well, they know I'll love them anyway, but that doesn't mean that envy won't cop a squat in my chest and make me writhe in jealousy, wasting away the last vestiges of goodness that I've managed to horde these past 43 years. Oh wait...I think I pissed the last of the goodness away when I wished bad mojo to the AntiChrist. Perhaps there's no hope...or help for me after all.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Butt Dragging
My tushie was dragging today. I did not want to be on the machine today, and neither did my fat legs. Ah well, I did it anyway. Today was just one of those days at work...Know what I mean? Just busy and working on budget stuff....SNORE! I had to juice the coffee big time.
Got reminded that tomorrow was potluck day at work, and I had to bring in bread. So..stopped at the store. I have to say, the upgrades they've made to my local Raley's is awesome. It's huge, and has hot foods, sushi, a coffee shoppe. I love it. Saves me from having to drive extra to Bel Air. The people are cool and friendly. It feels like part of the community. Love it!!!
Got reminded that tomorrow was potluck day at work, and I had to bring in bread. So..stopped at the store. I have to say, the upgrades they've made to my local Raley's is awesome. It's huge, and has hot foods, sushi, a coffee shoppe. I love it. Saves me from having to drive extra to Bel Air. The people are cool and friendly. It feels like part of the community. Love it!!!
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
I gotta PEE!!!
Today was busy!!! I managed to down a gallon of water today. But I gotta tell ya, I was in a meeting that lasted an hour and a half, and I had to pee so bad I was in serious pain. What up with that? I don't think I've had to pee that bad in years...possibly since the infamous Tahoe trip so many years back.
It's good that I'm drinking water, but sometimes I forget about that damned diuretic, and it reminds me at the worst time. Ah well. I practically sprinted to the restroom and every step was painful. Why didn't I just get up from the meeting and go? Because I was taking notes and was afraid I'd miss something. Ah well... it was funny.
It's good that I'm drinking water, but sometimes I forget about that damned diuretic, and it reminds me at the worst time. Ah well. I practically sprinted to the restroom and every step was painful. Why didn't I just get up from the meeting and go? Because I was taking notes and was afraid I'd miss something. Ah well... it was funny.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Legal stuff....
So I consulted with the lawyers about the trailer issue. They were good common sense people. I have a clear direction to go and they consulted for free. How cool was that? You hear all the lawyer jokes and everything, but these people seemed to sense my desperation and it's comforting to know that I have options.
My mother is a different story. I've asked for a copy of the recent contract, and she can't seem to find it. She's so lacksidasical about her legal issues, contracts etc. She never thinks about consequences or the future. She leaves that to me to figure out. How much can you wish for a 60 year old woman to get it together. If she can't do it now, she never will and this is the future I have to look forward to. Instead of God giving me children (except the beloved Boy), he gave me family responsibility.
I asked my husband what I did in a past life to deserve this. Was I Hitler? I must've been a real bitch! Ah well, when I come back, I want to come back as one of my kitties! They are so damned spoiled, there isn't anything we don't give them. They have their treats, run of the house, self cleaning litter box, and our love, of course... If you ask them, we probably don't give them enough..typical cats. Enough of my whining...I don't have cheese to go with it.
I'm doing ok, and with a little luck, I'll be doing better.
My mother is a different story. I've asked for a copy of the recent contract, and she can't seem to find it. She's so lacksidasical about her legal issues, contracts etc. She never thinks about consequences or the future. She leaves that to me to figure out. How much can you wish for a 60 year old woman to get it together. If she can't do it now, she never will and this is the future I have to look forward to. Instead of God giving me children (except the beloved Boy), he gave me family responsibility.
I asked my husband what I did in a past life to deserve this. Was I Hitler? I must've been a real bitch! Ah well, when I come back, I want to come back as one of my kitties! They are so damned spoiled, there isn't anything we don't give them. They have their treats, run of the house, self cleaning litter box, and our love, of course... If you ask them, we probably don't give them enough..typical cats. Enough of my whining...I don't have cheese to go with it.
I'm doing ok, and with a little luck, I'll be doing better.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Naughty Day
Started out great. Did the 3 mile hill walk, came back and got ready to take my buddy Chris out for her birthday. She picked Olive Garden for Lunch. Fortunately for me, I hadn't eaten breakfast...and after that lunch...didn't eat dinner either. I was stuffed! We had the garden salad...awesome, I ate one breadstick, we had stuffed mushrooms, I drank a glass of wine and had the 5-cheese ravioli...in the words of Rachel Ray..."Yummo". I was loaded down.
We headed to Wild Bills and my buddy got her navel pierced. Then headed to the mall and did some shopping. All the exercise clothes & my favorite Avia shoes was on sale...and I desperately needed exercise clothes, so I bought them. It will be so cool to exercise in actual workout clothes instead of the pants and old cotton leotards that I have.
It was great seeing the kids again and Papa Mark is in rare form...as always. Hope your back feels better Mark. Had a great time with my buddy, and it was a fantastic day.
We headed to Wild Bills and my buddy got her navel pierced. Then headed to the mall and did some shopping. All the exercise clothes & my favorite Avia shoes was on sale...and I desperately needed exercise clothes, so I bought them. It will be so cool to exercise in actual workout clothes instead of the pants and old cotton leotards that I have.
It was great seeing the kids again and Papa Mark is in rare form...as always. Hope your back feels better Mark. Had a great time with my buddy, and it was a fantastic day.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Collective Soul BooBoo
Ok, so I'm a member of the "Collective Souls"...yea, I know....I'm a freaking Geek, but I love them so. And they released tickets to their fan club members. I thought I had locked in front row seats, but I stupidly opened another web window to see if the condo was available, and when I confirmed the tickets, I confirmed the 9th row...not first.
OMG...what a DUMBASS!!! I so felt like crap because I got tickets for our friends too, and it comes out to $180 per couple. I called her and told her they were going for free and that I was really sorry about the whole thing. I was ready for her to kill me, but instead we end up fighting over them paying...I said no, she said shut up, we're paying...blah blah blah.
Next time, the man is standing behind my sorry ass to make sure I have the right tickets before I confirm. I just feel really rotten about it. Our friends are totally KEWL. We hung out in Cancun together in February. Ah well...I just knew I couldn't sleep until I confessed. Sorry Dean and Ed. Don't worry...one day we will be front and center!
OMG...what a DUMBASS!!! I so felt like crap because I got tickets for our friends too, and it comes out to $180 per couple. I called her and told her they were going for free and that I was really sorry about the whole thing. I was ready for her to kill me, but instead we end up fighting over them paying...I said no, she said shut up, we're paying...blah blah blah.
Next time, the man is standing behind my sorry ass to make sure I have the right tickets before I confirm. I just feel really rotten about it. Our friends are totally KEWL. We hung out in Cancun together in February. Ah well...I just knew I couldn't sleep until I confessed. Sorry Dean and Ed. Don't worry...one day we will be front and center!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
The Boy
Well I finally heard from the Boy today. He has not called since he left on March 3rd. Seems he isn't doing as well. He's walking with a cane and is on muscle relaxers. He also takes Ambien and is apparently hallucinating at night and scaring his young wife. He says he's having memory problems and has to carry around a note book so he doesn't forget things. It bothers me that the military hasn't figured out what is wrong with my boy. It bothers me more that my boy is not pro-active about his health.
I asked him what he's doing to help himself...has he researched his symptoms on the web? Does his doctor have a prognosis? What about physical therapy? Has he looked into any Holistic answers? The boy has done nothing, really. I know his hands are tied by the military and he's trying to get a CAT scan to see if that may be something, but, he should be researching the web for as much information as he can possibly find.
I explained to him that "he's not even 20 yet and he's walking with a cane. He still has 70 to 80 years left to live...Is this the way he wants to live them? Some day he's going to have kids, doesn't he want to play with them and be an active parent?" I told him that he needs to be far more aggressive in his health and his life. "You are the Captain of your ship and you have to steer your course...I can't do that for you". "You've told me that you're an adult and that you can handle your business, so you need to do that...I can't do the research for you!" I think he got what I was saying, but he's still young and has to learn that no one can do it for you. You have to bust ass to do it yourself.
I asked him what he's doing to help himself...has he researched his symptoms on the web? Does his doctor have a prognosis? What about physical therapy? Has he looked into any Holistic answers? The boy has done nothing, really. I know his hands are tied by the military and he's trying to get a CAT scan to see if that may be something, but, he should be researching the web for as much information as he can possibly find.
I explained to him that "he's not even 20 yet and he's walking with a cane. He still has 70 to 80 years left to live...Is this the way he wants to live them? Some day he's going to have kids, doesn't he want to play with them and be an active parent?" I told him that he needs to be far more aggressive in his health and his life. "You are the Captain of your ship and you have to steer your course...I can't do that for you". "You've told me that you're an adult and that you can handle your business, so you need to do that...I can't do the research for you!" I think he got what I was saying, but he's still young and has to learn that no one can do it for you. You have to bust ass to do it yourself.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Parents....
The parental unit is giving me problems again. She keeps insinuating herself into the whole Clear Lake trailer issue. This is something I don't want her help in. When she's involved, it's always a hearsay issue...i.e. he said, she said. I never get a straight story. Plus, after the way she was treated by the owner's mother, I'd just assume take their sorry butts to court and get back rent, pain and suffering for trying to blackmail me.
I really couldn't give a rats ass if I end up having to pull the trailer out for demolition. There are 3 grown trees that will have to come down which will make the trailer lot look like crap. I DON'T CARE! I wish my mother would just let this go and let me handle it. I took the responsibility and put it in my name.
Ah well. I guess it really doesn't matter. She does whatever she wants anyway. Just as long as she does it away from me!
I really couldn't give a rats ass if I end up having to pull the trailer out for demolition. There are 3 grown trees that will have to come down which will make the trailer lot look like crap. I DON'T CARE! I wish my mother would just let this go and let me handle it. I took the responsibility and put it in my name.
Ah well. I guess it really doesn't matter. She does whatever she wants anyway. Just as long as she does it away from me!
Monday, April 28, 2008
Moanday
Today went well, but the 3-mile walk was a drudge walk. I did not stop, but man, it sure hurt. I got back and attended a conference call for work. I sure like my job. I'm learning all kinds of stuff, which is cool. It's fresh and exciting.
Not much going on today...yet, but the day isn't over. I'm glad things are quiet on the homefront. It's been so long and lots of turmoil, and now...quiet. Makes me wonder what's around the corner...;-)
Not much going on today...yet, but the day isn't over. I'm glad things are quiet on the homefront. It's been so long and lots of turmoil, and now...quiet. Makes me wonder what's around the corner...;-)
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Raking Leaves
Today was work in the yard day. I raked leaves and cut back the rose branches on the trellis. As I was raking, I looked down and saw a birds nest with an egg and two freshly hatched babies. I don't know where the nest came from, I think it fell from a tree. I felt so bad. I put the nest in a tree, and am hoping that Mama bird finds them.
I ended up with 6 blisters on one hand. Guess I need to do more physical labor. I got softie hands. The man was grouchy all day. Not encouraging, nothing nice to say. He was exasperating. I tried to stay out of his way...know what I mean.
I ended up with 6 blisters on one hand. Guess I need to do more physical labor. I got softie hands. The man was grouchy all day. Not encouraging, nothing nice to say. He was exasperating. I tried to stay out of his way...know what I mean.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
WooHoo
Today was a big day. After doing my 3 mile walk, I got on the scale and.....I'm down a total of 30 lbs since January. Yea!!! Man oh man, I was happy. I went to my nutrition class and was on cloud nine. Afterward I met the man and Mom and Dad at ...Pasquale T's in Auburn. It's Dad's favorite restaurant and it's his 74th birthday. I tried to be good, but had a little fun. I had the antipasto salad and an appetizer of Calamari. I ended up eating half the calamari. I did however have the toasted Garlic Bread...which I should've said no to. It was decadent, buttery, garlicy...Hmmm.
Fortunately I'm not a big bread person, so I should be alright. We'll see.
Fortunately I'm not a big bread person, so I should be alright. We'll see.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Frantic
Last night I was having the best sleep. I listened to my relaxation tape, set my alarm clock for 3:00 a.m. and was out like a light. The husband got up sometime in the middle of the night, and I was vaguely thinking that I should look at my alarm clock. I told myself “No, you set it, don’t worry about it. Enjoy the sleep”, so back to sleep I went. The next time I woke up, I rolled over and looked at the clock. “OMG, it’s 5 a.m.! I should’ve left for work 10 minutes ago! “ I’ve missed my morning workout and now I’m 10 minutes late to the carpool!
I run to the kitchen where I have my Treo juicing, and pick it up to text the buddies, but it starts vibrating in my hand. Ah, one of the carpoolers is not on board…no need to tell him what a screw-up I am. I text the other one and tell her that I’m running 10 minutes late. No shower, slug down my protein drink and zoom off. While in transit I sent the following message to her “I’m driving” to let her know that I’ll be driving us. It’s too bad I didn’t finish the sentence cuz she took that to mean I’m driving myself and you’re on your own Sista! What a dope I am. When I get to the meet spot and realize she’s not there, I call her and she’s already in the commute. I figure since I’m running late anyway, I might as well pick up the coffee creamer.
Since I’ve been on this healthy kick, it bums me out not to exercise.
I run to the kitchen where I have my Treo juicing, and pick it up to text the buddies, but it starts vibrating in my hand. Ah, one of the carpoolers is not on board…no need to tell him what a screw-up I am. I text the other one and tell her that I’m running 10 minutes late. No shower, slug down my protein drink and zoom off. While in transit I sent the following message to her “I’m driving” to let her know that I’ll be driving us. It’s too bad I didn’t finish the sentence cuz she took that to mean I’m driving myself and you’re on your own Sista! What a dope I am. When I get to the meet spot and realize she’s not there, I call her and she’s already in the commute. I figure since I’m running late anyway, I might as well pick up the coffee creamer.
Since I’ve been on this healthy kick, it bums me out not to exercise.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Tired
Ok, I was going to go on a long-winded rant about "dumb-assed morons", but I'm just too tired. Plus, I've plateau'd on the weight again. Why won't just keep moving down? Must stay on the stairs to nowhere....
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
It's All About Me!
Today was an "all about me" day. I worked out in the morning, worked half the day, took the rest off and...Got my hair colored and got the nails done. It's so nice to be pampered once in awhile. You Ladies out there know what I'm talking about. You get so wrapped up in work, home, kids (if ya got em...Kristie) and sometimes you have to take time out and smell the sterling silver roses.
Today is my 1 year anniversary with the Network Management Bureau at my job. I love my job. I miss my ole e-file buddies, but I'm learning every day and it's still new and exciting. The Network guys are totally cool, and they don't mind explaining stuff that I'm still trying to grasp.
Had a kick-ass workout when I got home. I went the usual half hour and thought "I'm stepping it up to level 3", which I did for 10 minutes. That had me good and sweaty (somehow I think that phrase would only appeal to a man). Ah well, this is a short blog today. I'm off to shower, eat and go to bed...yes, I did sleep pretty well last night. It was hard to get my sorry ass out of bed.
Today is my 1 year anniversary with the Network Management Bureau at my job. I love my job. I miss my ole e-file buddies, but I'm learning every day and it's still new and exciting. The Network guys are totally cool, and they don't mind explaining stuff that I'm still trying to grasp.
Had a kick-ass workout when I got home. I went the usual half hour and thought "I'm stepping it up to level 3", which I did for 10 minutes. That had me good and sweaty (somehow I think that phrase would only appeal to a man). Ah well, this is a short blog today. I'm off to shower, eat and go to bed...yes, I did sleep pretty well last night. It was hard to get my sorry ass out of bed.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Kicking Zombie Ass, but No Sleep!
So last night I couldn’t sleep. Started the CPAP machine at 9:00 p.m. By 12:00 I was still wide awake, so I yanked off the face mask and shut off the machine. The man had the living room television loud, so he could hear it when he came to bed. There he was, snoring up a storm and I was awake. So at 1:00 a.m. I got up and shut it off. I finally fell asleep, only to dream of some kind of zombie experiment gone awry and having to save my kitty. Woke up about 2 a.m. and stayed that way till the alarm went off.
Wondered how I was going to do on the stair machine, but once I put on my workout music, the ½ hour went by fast! I made a new playlist with fast rocking women and I love it. Made me feel like a butt-kicking femme fatale! At least I finally feel like I have a routine in place. I don’t like working out at 3:15 a.m., but I accept that I need to…damn the bad luck!
Everyone has advice on what I should eat and what I shouldn’t. I’ve told everyone at work that I’m on a lifestyle change, which I am, not a DIET! I’ve been bringing my healthy lunches, etc. Can you imagine if I even entertained the idea of bariatric surgery with most of my co-workers? The comments I would get. Not so sure I’m ready for all of that.
Got home and got on the machine and you'd never believe it. I was on it for 61 minutes at level 2. Not that I intended to do that but when I finally opened my eyes to look at the minutes, I was at 47 minutes. Then I thought..."Hell, I can do 3 minutes more". Once I got there I figured I was too close to an hour not to do it. Got to 61 minutes. Damn, I hope to hell it makes me sleep like the dead!
Wondered how I was going to do on the stair machine, but once I put on my workout music, the ½ hour went by fast! I made a new playlist with fast rocking women and I love it. Made me feel like a butt-kicking femme fatale! At least I finally feel like I have a routine in place. I don’t like working out at 3:15 a.m., but I accept that I need to…damn the bad luck!
Everyone has advice on what I should eat and what I shouldn’t. I’ve told everyone at work that I’m on a lifestyle change, which I am, not a DIET! I’ve been bringing my healthy lunches, etc. Can you imagine if I even entertained the idea of bariatric surgery with most of my co-workers? The comments I would get. Not so sure I’m ready for all of that.
Got home and got on the machine and you'd never believe it. I was on it for 61 minutes at level 2. Not that I intended to do that but when I finally opened my eyes to look at the minutes, I was at 47 minutes. Then I thought..."Hell, I can do 3 minutes more". Once I got there I figured I was too close to an hour not to do it. Got to 61 minutes. Damn, I hope to hell it makes me sleep like the dead!
Monday, April 21, 2008
The Dreaded "Diet" word!
I've been on this "weight loss" journey since I was nine years old. My Mother, who had always been skinny, gave up cigarettes for God when I was about 5. She gained a lot of weight during her pregnancy with my sister and after her birth made it her mission to lose weight. Of course, she couldn't do it alone so I had to diet with her...thus started my rollercoaster ride with diet and food.
I still remember the dreaded Cottage Cheese and Hamburger diet...that's all we ate. To this day, I can't eat the two of them together. During my teen years, I wasn't really fat, but thought I was. That carried into my twenties. I was always dieting, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Atkins, Susanne Summers, Southbeach,...The rollercoaster became more dramatic, up-down. God, I swear, I've lost somewhere in the neighborhood of over 500 lbs over the years. Lose 25, gain 30...lose 30, gain 45...lose 30 gain 60..it never stops. One day, going through some old pictures my husband had taken (we were friends for awhile before we hooked up), I came across a picture of me in a black one piece bathing suit, standing in Gurlie Creek. OMG...I was not FAT! I actually looked damned good! I ran screaming to the man, with the picture clutched in my hand..."Look, Look, I'm not Fat!" He started laughing and said "No, what made you think you were?" "I've always been fat! Ever since I was little".
I went back to look at old pictures, and no, I wasn't fat. There were times when I was a little chubby, but nothing major. Not like what's been in my head for years. And now I am fat and I let the thin me go, without ever realizing I had her. My self-loathing never let me see what was actually in front of my face.
So I started back on the journey last August, but let myself be waylaid by the holidays and the family crap that goes with it. I ate a lot this past Christmas. I was upset and I let it get the best of me, reaching my all-time weight high in January. I got back on the routine and have since lost 25 lbs. Along with that comes trying to accept me for me. I read an interesting blog, where one person said that they run their hands over their stomach every morning to feel the changes, and I started to laugh. Someone does the same thing I do!
I don't "diet" anymore. I'm changing eating habits. The funny thing is, I actually eat quite healthy. My husband is always looking at labels, and 90% of the stuff in our home is good stuff. I just like too much of a good thing. When the man cooks a superb prime rib and gives you this 1 1/2 inch slab on your plate, it's hard to stop. The funny thing is lately...I have been. I've been researching my weightloss options and thinking about what's out there. My fear is that I will work so hard to take it off and rollercoaster back up. I've thought of Gastric bypass but that's a little too dramatic for me. I've also looked at the Lap band and read a lot of the blogs out there. At first, I thought I was "cheating" if I took that option, but I'm working so hard to take it off. That does not change with the band. I still have to work at it.
Anyway, just sharing thoughts, purging the soul (no, never been a binge and purge person...did binge in my 20's but that was it...kept it in). This is part of the process for me. Have to rid myself of the crap. But let's leave this on a great note. I did my walk today and it was GREAT! I'm getting faster and faster up the hills...still a struggle, but getting better. One day, I will run up those hills and they won't stop me.
I still remember the dreaded Cottage Cheese and Hamburger diet...that's all we ate. To this day, I can't eat the two of them together. During my teen years, I wasn't really fat, but thought I was. That carried into my twenties. I was always dieting, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Atkins, Susanne Summers, Southbeach,...The rollercoaster became more dramatic, up-down. God, I swear, I've lost somewhere in the neighborhood of over 500 lbs over the years. Lose 25, gain 30...lose 30, gain 45...lose 30 gain 60..it never stops. One day, going through some old pictures my husband had taken (we were friends for awhile before we hooked up), I came across a picture of me in a black one piece bathing suit, standing in Gurlie Creek. OMG...I was not FAT! I actually looked damned good! I ran screaming to the man, with the picture clutched in my hand..."Look, Look, I'm not Fat!" He started laughing and said "No, what made you think you were?" "I've always been fat! Ever since I was little".
I went back to look at old pictures, and no, I wasn't fat. There were times when I was a little chubby, but nothing major. Not like what's been in my head for years. And now I am fat and I let the thin me go, without ever realizing I had her. My self-loathing never let me see what was actually in front of my face.
So I started back on the journey last August, but let myself be waylaid by the holidays and the family crap that goes with it. I ate a lot this past Christmas. I was upset and I let it get the best of me, reaching my all-time weight high in January. I got back on the routine and have since lost 25 lbs. Along with that comes trying to accept me for me. I read an interesting blog, where one person said that they run their hands over their stomach every morning to feel the changes, and I started to laugh. Someone does the same thing I do!
I don't "diet" anymore. I'm changing eating habits. The funny thing is, I actually eat quite healthy. My husband is always looking at labels, and 90% of the stuff in our home is good stuff. I just like too much of a good thing. When the man cooks a superb prime rib and gives you this 1 1/2 inch slab on your plate, it's hard to stop. The funny thing is lately...I have been. I've been researching my weightloss options and thinking about what's out there. My fear is that I will work so hard to take it off and rollercoaster back up. I've thought of Gastric bypass but that's a little too dramatic for me. I've also looked at the Lap band and read a lot of the blogs out there. At first, I thought I was "cheating" if I took that option, but I'm working so hard to take it off. That does not change with the band. I still have to work at it.
Anyway, just sharing thoughts, purging the soul (no, never been a binge and purge person...did binge in my 20's but that was it...kept it in). This is part of the process for me. Have to rid myself of the crap. But let's leave this on a great note. I did my walk today and it was GREAT! I'm getting faster and faster up the hills...still a struggle, but getting better. One day, I will run up those hills and they won't stop me.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
In love with my iPod
Are you dependent upon your iPod when you work out? Ever had your iPod die while working out?
I don’t know about you, but I’m totally dependent upon my tunes. My level of exertion is equal to the beat of the song. The slower the song, the slower I’m stepping. If I step slow..then I want off the damned machine. You feel me?
So it’s 3:20 in the morning and I hop on the machine…I’ve got “Jet” playing and I’m maybe 3 minutes into the workout when the iPod dies. I’ve been having problems holding a charge, but I’ve had the iPod forever. I’m thinking “Crap, no music, no workout” when I remember the iPod I bought the man is sitting in the spare bedroom. Serene used it to watch a movie.
I load my workout playlist on and jump back onto the machine. By the time I’m back on it’s 3:40….Now I’m behind…gotta leave the house by 4:45. Needless to say, I went to work with wet hair, but at least I did it.
I have a love affair with my iPod…I use it every day. If not working out, then in the truck…it’s wired for iPod. I listen to PodCasts, my music, I have Disney music for Serene that we sing together. I’m thinking if this battery situation keeps coming up, I may have to get a new one. I didn’t want to because eventually I want the iPhone when it has more storage, etc. This way, I can keep the old iPod in the truck. Hope I hear an announcement in June….”Steve Jobs…oh Stevie Pooh…Hello my MacDaddy. I’d like an iPhone that offers 64 gig, 3G, WiFi, Bluetooth, 3rd party apps, a removable battery…delivered to my door by Vin Diesel”. Ah well, I guess it isn’t Christmas time yet. I’m holding out for June. I think we’ll hear some news then. The big question will be…can I afford it? Gotta get rid of my mother’s trailer….
I don’t know about you, but I’m totally dependent upon my tunes. My level of exertion is equal to the beat of the song. The slower the song, the slower I’m stepping. If I step slow..then I want off the damned machine. You feel me?
So it’s 3:20 in the morning and I hop on the machine…I’ve got “Jet” playing and I’m maybe 3 minutes into the workout when the iPod dies. I’ve been having problems holding a charge, but I’ve had the iPod forever. I’m thinking “Crap, no music, no workout” when I remember the iPod I bought the man is sitting in the spare bedroom. Serene used it to watch a movie.
I load my workout playlist on and jump back onto the machine. By the time I’m back on it’s 3:40….Now I’m behind…gotta leave the house by 4:45. Needless to say, I went to work with wet hair, but at least I did it.
I have a love affair with my iPod…I use it every day. If not working out, then in the truck…it’s wired for iPod. I listen to PodCasts, my music, I have Disney music for Serene that we sing together. I’m thinking if this battery situation keeps coming up, I may have to get a new one. I didn’t want to because eventually I want the iPhone when it has more storage, etc. This way, I can keep the old iPod in the truck. Hope I hear an announcement in June….”Steve Jobs…oh Stevie Pooh…Hello my MacDaddy. I’d like an iPhone that offers 64 gig, 3G, WiFi, Bluetooth, 3rd party apps, a removable battery…delivered to my door by Vin Diesel”. Ah well, I guess it isn’t Christmas time yet. I’m holding out for June. I think we’ll hear some news then. The big question will be…can I afford it? Gotta get rid of my mother’s trailer….
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Spasms...NO, Not those kind!
OK, so have you ever suffered a right buttock muscle spasm while on your workout machine? I seem to be getting them frequently. I think I favor my right leg while climbing the stairs to nowhere (StairMaster) and my butt cheek is complaining.
When it hits, I’ve been trying to push more with the left and making a concerted effort to move them both at the same time, but somehow when you zone out while listening to music, you forget. Thank God I know how to stretch this muscle out, or else I’d be in serious trouble. However, I did give the husband cause to raise his eyebrow when I got out the percussion back massager and started going to town on the butt cheek. That was painful.
Could you imagine peeking in our sliding glass window and seeing a woman using one of those things on her tushie and screaming out in pain? I think you’d probably misconstrue that as a different kind of scream and be laughing about what turns me on…. Ah, I digress.
Poor bastard…he’s had to put up with quite a few weird things from me. How about when your leg cramps up in the middle of the night…waking you from a dead sleep and you start screaming like there’s someone in the bedroom trying to kill you. Oh man, does that hurt! You can’t even enjoy scaring the hell out of your spouse when that happens.
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When it hits, I’ve been trying to push more with the left and making a concerted effort to move them both at the same time, but somehow when you zone out while listening to music, you forget. Thank God I know how to stretch this muscle out, or else I’d be in serious trouble. However, I did give the husband cause to raise his eyebrow when I got out the percussion back massager and started going to town on the butt cheek. That was painful.
Could you imagine peeking in our sliding glass window and seeing a woman using one of those things on her tushie and screaming out in pain? I think you’d probably misconstrue that as a different kind of scream and be laughing about what turns me on…. Ah, I digress.
Poor bastard…he’s had to put up with quite a few weird things from me. How about when your leg cramps up in the middle of the night…waking you from a dead sleep and you start screaming like there’s someone in the bedroom trying to kill you. Oh man, does that hurt! You can’t even enjoy scaring the hell out of your spouse when that happens.
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Friday, April 18, 2008
My Year...Damn it!
So I’m on this journey to get healthy. I decided last year that 2008 was going to be my year. It’s my year to enlighten myself spiritually, to get my mental ducks in order and to physically get into shape. It seems like for years, it’s been about everyone else. When you have kids, that’s a necessity, but once they’re grown, you let go (easier said than done). When family is involved, it’s much more difficult.
I have health issues that come from putting me second. Stress eating has caused me to put on many pounds over the years and that has caused high blood pressure, sleep apnea, lower back pain, etc. So I’ve finally reached my breaking point.
Since February 26th, I’ve been on a routine. Tuesday – Friday I exercise on the StairMaster (affectionately named “Vin” except when I’m protesting…then it’s A$$hole) twice a day…A half hour in the morning and a half hour in the evening. On Saturdays and Mondays I do a three mile walk up and down hills (I live in the Sierra’s). I’ve finally gotten to the point where I don’t have to stop on an incline..(you should’ve seen me gasping for air like a cigarette junkie climbing a flight of stairs…too funny).
On Sunday’s it’s “God’s Day” …a day of rest. Ok, ya’ll know I believe in God, but am not deeply religious. I’m gonna use any excuse to have a day to sleep in, etc.
I’ve been packing my lunch and eating a salad every day…sometimes two salads. Gave up the carbonated drinks. Lightened up on the margaritas. And I limit myself to a half glass of wine. So far, I’ve lost 25 lbs. I gotta ways to go, so I’ll be taking you along on my journey.
I have health issues that come from putting me second. Stress eating has caused me to put on many pounds over the years and that has caused high blood pressure, sleep apnea, lower back pain, etc. So I’ve finally reached my breaking point.
Since February 26th, I’ve been on a routine. Tuesday – Friday I exercise on the StairMaster (affectionately named “Vin” except when I’m protesting…then it’s A$$hole) twice a day…A half hour in the morning and a half hour in the evening. On Saturdays and Mondays I do a three mile walk up and down hills (I live in the Sierra’s). I’ve finally gotten to the point where I don’t have to stop on an incline..(you should’ve seen me gasping for air like a cigarette junkie climbing a flight of stairs…too funny).
On Sunday’s it’s “God’s Day” …a day of rest. Ok, ya’ll know I believe in God, but am not deeply religious. I’m gonna use any excuse to have a day to sleep in, etc.
I’ve been packing my lunch and eating a salad every day…sometimes two salads. Gave up the carbonated drinks. Lightened up on the margaritas. And I limit myself to a half glass of wine. So far, I’ve lost 25 lbs. I gotta ways to go, so I’ll be taking you along on my journey.
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