Post Script

My winning Cheezy Christmas entry....

Have a very Cheezy Christmas!!!

Wow…another Cheezy Christmas under my belt and a win for the Cheeziest gift (because some tasteless soul could possibly like it).  I gotta tell you though, the competition was fierce, and the two top winners…I felt…were the Tampon Flasks and the Genital hand gel..see below:

I was laughing so hard over these two that I really didn’t think I had a ghost of a chance of winning…especially since I used my backup gift because the butt floss was unavailable.

I think I’ve described the Cheezy Christmas in a prior blog post…but just in case… Around 2000, a group of us Ladies, known as the Trashies, started a Christmas tradition.  Originally, there was just 8 of us and we’d get together for Christmas and vie for who could bring in the most cheeziest Christmas present.  We even created a crown and the winner would display the crown for a year and have boasting rights.  Everyone was required to keep their cheezy gift on their desk for the year until the next Christmas. 

Well, word got out about what we were doing, and the fun we were having and people would beg to be a part of it.  The trick is making sure the RIGHT people are included. What do I mean by that?  Well, we’re not politically correct AT ALL!  If someone is a part of the Cheezy Christmas, they cannot take offense to anything said, shown or done.  Our group has grown to about 25 people…some retired now, and we’re still having just as much fun as ever. We’ve managed to stay under the radar, which is difficult around this place and people keep coming back and getting more and more creative.

This is an occasion that we all look forward to every year.  I'm thankful that we're all still here to enjoy it. 

Instant Gratification Junkies

We’ve turned into a Nation of Instant Gratification Junkies.  Everything has to be had NOW, service has to be given right away. Who cares if you’re inconvenienced, as long as I’m not inconvenienced…REALLY?  We’re a bunch of inconsiderate, self-absorbed assholes!!!

I remember being raised on the phrase “Good things come to those who wait”. And although I freely admit to being impatient as a kid, and wanting it NOW, I had to wait.  Growing up poor, you basically know…you can wait till hell freezes over…you’re not getting that cool pair of shoes, or that Stretch Armstrong toy that you really wanted (I told you I was part Guy).   Go ahead…hold your breath…I dare ya!!!  All the crying and pouting in the world isn’t going to change things Ladies and Gentlemen….or is it?  

Now, grown assed adults are kicking and screaming, wanting their way, and they’re getting it!!! They are pushing their way to the front of the line…grocery line, amusement park line, any line where they perceive that they have the right to be in front and shouldn’t be inconvenienced with waiting like the rest of us ignorant peasants!  They’re demanding things they don’t have a right to demand, but because they scream loud enough, people are afraid of the commotion being caused and give in.

More and more Americans, who have the ability to work, don’t and want to be taken care of by our Government. Worse, not only do they not work, they don’t cook, they don’t take care of their children, they don’t take care of their environment and are some of the worst offenders of the “Me’ism” culture.

Why do you think we have so many fast food options?  People don’t have the patience to shop, prepare and cook a meal.  Oh they’ll tell you they just don’t have the time, but the majority do…they just don’t want to make it a priority.  Don’t get me wrong….I don’t mind stopping at Wonderful Chinese for my favorite Won Ton Soup when I don’t want to cook or need a break, or I don’t have the time…but I don’t do it every night!  I don’t do it every week!   I don’t mind KFC once in a blue moon…I mean, we’re talking the Colonel here, with those top secret herbs and spices!

We, as a Nation, are suffering the consequences of our actions. Our children are fat, lazy, mouthy, petulant versions of our adult selves, and we can’t be bothered to discipline them or teach them some kind of moral code. The rate of autistic children has skyrocketed, and I can’t help but wonder if the food that we’re consuming has something to do with it.  All the preservatives, additives and genetic tampering of our produce and livestock…. I am aware that there are some adults that work at eating healthy and carefully choose the food they consume, but because of our Government regulations, have no idea what they may be consuming and despite their best efforts, contaminating their children through no fault of their own.  All because it has to be done easier, better, bigger and corporations have to make money and deprive the average farmer of a living.

Since when did minimum wage jobs like McDonald’s become a career?  It’s a brainless job that helps you make some money and learn responsibility…not a means of raising a family, buying a home and preparing for retirement!!  But hey, some people think that flipping burgers is worth $15+ dollars an hour and are willing to protest for it.  They’re not willing to expend brain power or muscle to earn their living. Let me clue you in to something Mr. I want more money for working at McDonald’s…Supply and demand will dictate the market, and if your higher wage means higher prices for a crappy burger…I pass.  I can make my own crappy burger and it’ll taste a hell of a lot better than yours!!!  Let me be clear.. I am not bagging on anyone in desperate need of a job and is working at McDonald’s to make ends meet…Just understand that McDonalds is temporary…not permanent!!

And when someone stands up against all of this instant gratification crap, they get persecuted for it. “Oh, you’re not being politically correct and you don’t care.  Your opinion ‘offends’ me”.  Boo Fucking Hoo!!!  Your laziness and attitude offend me, and I’m sick to death with having to put up with your baby tantrums and foot stomping.

What got me started on this particular rant???  See Below.....

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When a Customer Left a Nasty Note on a Business Owner's Page, He Probably Wasn't Expecting a Viral Response

• Caroline Schaeffer
• On December 15, 2013
• http://ijreview.com

We all know Christmas shoppers can be a little crazy, so when a customer of Liberty Bottleworks started harassing employees of the company in phone calls and online, co-founder Ryan Clark responded in a big way.

Liberty is a small business that supports American manufacturing, eco-friendly practices, and the hiring of veterans, so it’s no surprise that management takes the well-being of their employees very seriously.

After the customer attacked the company online, Clark responded with a polite, carefully crafted response that has since gone viral. Especially during the holiday season, he says, his employees have a right to enjoy the Christmas spirit. At his company? “Family First, Product Second.”

Via Adweek:

Coming Out The Other Side

The one thing about addiction that they never tell you is that the addicted person both during and post addiction are the same…and they’re not. Confusing, huh?

BDDS

First..they’re the same. What I mean is that they still have that addictive personality and just because they stop their habit doesn’t mean they stop the behavior that they had while they were using.  This can be extremely hard to live with because it’s not like you can tell them to stop using…they already have. How do you change the personality so that they don’t exhibit the same behavior and drive you up the wall?

Second…they’re different.  Well, because of the damage that their addiction has wreaked on their bodies, they’re unable to do the things they used to do, or think the way they used to think. There are side effects and consequences to the choices they have made. Sometimes it’s extremely severe. We’re talking brain impairment, walking and unable to enjoy the simple things in life.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not pointing any of these things out to make myself look better.  On the contrary, I think I can speak to these things due to my own addiction.  However, I was lucky…my addiction was not as severe.  Yes, I’m talking about my food addiction. It’s as every bit an addiction as alcohol, heroin, crack…etc.  It causes morbid obesity, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, high stress to joints, exhaustion, low self-esteem and in extreme cases, death…and the list goes on.

I daily fight my behavior that goes hand in hand with my addiction, because I know that without the “head work”, I’ll revert back to the person I was…weight and all. I also struggle with not transferring my addiction to something else, i.e. alcohol and spending money. For some reason, these two things could easily take the place of eating, so I have to watch it.

I am different in that the side effects for me were body damage and esteem issues.  Fortunately, my muscles and strength are better than before, but my skin took a heavy toll. I had the excess skin removed, but my scars and the issues involved with the healing will be permanent reminders of the road that I took.  I still have issues on whether or not I’m “good enough” and I take far too many “selfies” to assure myself that I’m ok looking.  Why am I hashing this out?

Well, I have a family member that will be coming out the other side of her alcohol addiction and we don’t know the person she will be.  We don’t know if she’ll have permanent brain damage, and the physical shape she’ll be in. Sitting by her side at the hospital is a stark reminder to me of how lucky I am, and how much worse it could’ve been. I’m optimistic that she’ll come out ok, but I don’t think she’ll ever be completely the same.  The one thing I hope for was that this episode is her “bottom”…the point to where the only direct for her is up.  If it isn’t, she might not be so lucky next time.

All I Want For Christmas

I was really looking forward to spending my Christmas and New Years with my guy.  I wanted an opportunity to just “be” with him.  You know, without all the hype, vacation stuff, big plans, etc.  I want to see what it would be like to greet him when he comes home from work, cook a nice dinner and just enjoy it. Spend some time talking about all the things we don’t waste time on the phone with…the little intimate details of our personalities and lives; the stories about our pasts; about our families; about our biggest disappointments and successes…the things that make us who we are.

Turns out he had to go home to his parents for his dad’s surgery. Not sure when he’ll be back to his place.  This is both good and bad. First the bad:

It seems like every time we plan something, it goes south and life just gets in the way.  Not trying to be pessimistic about it or anything, but really?  This is like the 5th time life has gotten in the way, so if I tend to be a bit snarky about it, I think you can understand why.

Now the good:

I did receive an offer to their family home for Christmas, along with an offer to pay for the difference in my ticket change.  His parents and his brothers will be there. Wow…if a guy invites you to meet his parents and his siblings, you have to mean something to him…otherwise, he’d have every excuse in the book to avoid you meeting them.  So I’m flattered about that. If there was any question about what I mean to him, it’s been answered. Although I didn’t have any, I know my peeps did.

Someone made a comment that I shouldn’t be having a relationship with my iPhone…that I need a flesh and blood man within my proximity.  The funny thing is…I’m getting more action with my iPhone relationship than they are with their marriage and living in the same house as their husband.  So far, I’m doing pretty well and I like the way things are…with just a little more interaction.  That’s not to say that if the opportunity presents itself, we won’t find a way to be in closer proximity.  I think I can safely say that we both want that.

We've talked about moving in together and our future. We've talked about our obstacles, challenges...etc. Ah well..

Getting Tapped Out

It’s Christmas time…time of happiness and good cheer.  I’m starting to feel the stress of it all.  I hate shopping and I hate crowds…unless we’re all banded together to enjoy a concert or witness something grand.

I always feel like I’m under pressure, but this year it feels a bit stronger. I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders and while I know it’s just perception, I do not need stuff happening a week before Christmas.  Received a call from my mother.

I couldn’t take it at the time she called because I had a guest, but after the guest left, I listened to her message. She’s crying about my brother having two additional heart stents inserted and wanted to know why she was left out of the loop. She doesn’t understand what’s going on and to please call.

This is coming off the heels of the prior night’s discussion, which was about the orb spirits in her home and her quest to find out why they’re there and whatharm might come to her.  She posted a couple of videos of the orbs on FaceBook and I had to tell her that the general public will consider her crazy and she shouldn’t have posted them. Come to find out that she thought that tagging me in the post would mean that only I could see them….NOPE!   She then goes on to say that she’s afraid that she’ll be abducted…yes, by aliens.  

Now it’s about my brother and death.  I called her and let her vent. Of course she wanted to know when I knew, etc.  I told her that I knew about the doctor visit ahead of time, but had no idea what the outcome would be (stents? Open heart surgery? Nothing?) and didn’t find out about the stents until FaceBook..and my brother posted within a couple of hours.  

Her argument is that she isn’t always on FaceBook and someone should’ve called her. Yeah, well stand in line Mom. I should’ve had the call before you…being that I’m the Advance Directive Designee.  She also blames the fact that my brother has his heart issues due to his drug use and the choices he made.  It pissed me off that she’d automatically throw him under the bus when:

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1.  He learned his drug use from her

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2.  They’d done drugs together in the past.

3.  He quit using drugs a number of years ago…BEFORE SHE DID!

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4.  We have a history of heart disease in our family

It’s so convenient to forget your part in his early drug use…isn’t it!  So I reminded her of where he learned about his drug use, and that she needs to accept the possibility that my brother may not live to be an old man.

She did not like the sound of that.  I told her that during the years when she and I didn’t speak, it was because I needed to accept that she may kill herself with the habits and drug use, and that I didn’t need to watch her do it. There just comes a time when you have to let go and live with what you have.  I also told her that the current world record for heart stents is 34 and my brother has 19.  He still has a ways to go.

That news made her feel better.  She says I have a way of using logic to calm her.  Yeah, logic is absent in her and my sister.  My brother and I got most of it (although the boy and the niece are extremely logical….there’s hope for the next generation).

Its times like these that I turn to the Serenity Prayer…but I tell ya Peeps, it’s a little difficult to accept Cray Cray!

Crossroads

A family member is in the hospital.   as my  I worry more about her daughter though because she can sometimes be in a fragile state of mind.  She has a lot on her plate.

She needs to make decisions on her marriage (or lack thereof) and her future, but she finds reasons at every turn not to.  Now, with her mother not doing well, I’m afraid that she’s going to put it off even longer.  What worries me is what will happen if she does.  What will happen to her will and spirit? What will happen to her future?  She already feels somewhat alienated from her son, and her son is her life.

Once her Mom gets out of the hospital, she’s going to need some in-home care, and this is the perfect opportunity for her to move out and start establishing a life of her own.  Hey, if her man wants her back, he can woo her all over again, right?  Ok, it didn’t work for me, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t work for her.  I have to believe that true love always wins in the end.

Her daughter is at a crossroad. She can either make the changes she needs to build her life back to what she needs, or she can keep the life she has…but this means that if you accept that life, you can’t bitch about it to those who have worried with you and struggled to give you options and advice.  You have to work at making the life you choose what it needs to be.  Yeah, that isn’t easy…and I know it.  But the serenity that comes from accepting your choice and working at it is worth it.

Damn Conspiring Fate...

Do you ever get this feeling every once in a while that fate is conspiring against you and that maybe, no matter what you do, you just can’t change it? I can beat my head against a wall, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that wall will give in and I’ll finally break through.  Chances are….I’m gonna crack my skull against it.

 

What’s that saying about the definition of insanity…Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results? I guess that I just have to accept that some things will never change…people will never change, situations will never change…I just have a real difficult time with that concept. And I know that sooner or later, I’m gonna have to embrace it. 

 

I fought this concept with my marriage, thinking that my husband could change…he couldn’t. I fought this concept with my sister…surely she could change, I mean, wouldn’t any mother change for the sake of their children (This also applies to my mother)?  No.  But then I started thinking…what is the common denominator in all of these instances…and the ones I haven’t named…?

 

Hmmmm.  That would be me. I am the common denominator and maybe they are the ones that don’t need to change.  Maybe I’m the one that needs to change. I need to make different choices, I need to extract myself from these situations and change them for me.  But then again…there I go, trying to initiate change…yet again.  It’s like this vicious circle that I can’t seem to get out of.  Ah well…

 

Christmas is Coming!!!

I tell ya, I always have a hard time during the Christmas season.  Being an ex-Jehovah’s Witness, I didn’t grow up celebrating the holiday.  I only embraced it on my own in my 20’s…not to celebrate the birth of Christ (cuz everyone knows he wasn’t born on December 25^th) but to celebrate the people in my life, i.e. family and friends.  The gift purchasing really didn’t start until the Nephews and Nieces arrival.

Now I’m in a quandary of what to get them.  The Boy, I know, I’m giving cash.  He’s driving out to visit so the money will help with gas, etc…with a little left over for something. My Beanster is 11.  I’m thinking a Kindle Fire.  I don’t think she’s at the right age for a iPad, and they are expensive.  This would allow her to access the web for school, watch Netflix and let me monitor how she takes care of it for her Apple future.  I was also thinking about some clothes and maybe a jacket.

What do I send the kids in Omaha? One is 19, one is 16 and the other is 8.  I need something easy to mail and age appropriate.  I can always do gift certificates for the two older ones, but the 8 year old is gonna take some thought.  I don’t really buy for adults, so it shouldn’t be too bad. 

God knows I haven’t done a Christmas Newsletter in a long time….my guess is since 09. 2010 is the breakup year where everything happened all at once and 2011 was the house renovation year.  I moved in (officially) March of 2012. Guess I need to get off my tushie and do that as well…but I just don’t see it happening this year.  Wonder if I could get a picture on Santa’s lap…that would be fun!  Although I did write a letter to Santa last year….and he did give me what I asked for, so I’m not doing half bad.

Damned Daylight Savings!!!

I've slacked off on my exercising and I'm feeling it.  So tonight, I wanted to come home and do a power walk. The sun was shining, but it was still cold...around 45 degrees.  I donned my Marines sweat jacket, black pants, arm band for the iPhone, etc.

Off I started...walking briskly, the cold air kissing my face. My beanie on to protect my ears...laughably stylin' Baby!  The walk was going well, but I really underestimated how quickly the sun would fall.  On the tail end of my journey back, it was dark and I'm wearing dark clothes..not good.

Not only that, I ended up rolling my left ankle, but I don't think it's too bad.  I'll find out tomorrow when I jump on Vin Diesel.  I need to pick up some reflective bands, just in case I misjudge the time again.  I really like being outside, even if it is cold (although I'll take that statement back in Denver and the 7 degree weather....) and it makes me feel better.

I like all of the seasons, and even though we're enduring a cold snap, I still like the crisp air.  Yes, it gets cold in California people!

Hurting...

Just hung up with the ex-husband, who called to tell me how much he loves and misses me.  He said that he was jealous of the cowboy because I was spending Christmas with him. After that comment, there was a huge space of silence.

I said "You don't have a right to be. You had me, I was yours and you let me go". He was silent, then said "I know"...and then we talked about the boy.

This kind of conversation always hurts. I will always love him, but I'm no longer in love with him.  What the hell am I supposed to say when he comes at me with a comment like that? He never recognizes what I went thru for him.

I waited years for him to get it together, to quit drinking,  to make us a priority,  to hold on to my wedding vows...for better or for worse.  But was I supposed to toss away my retirement, after pleading for years and years for him to get help, to change, to quit?  I already gave up children for him and night after night being awake and wondering if he was going to make it home without killing someone, without a lawsuit taking our home or way of life.

When he says those things, he rips out my heart all over again because I question myself, and ask if I did the right thing.  I know I did because at least half of the time we spent together (12 years worth) was spent in turmoil, conflict, fighting and tears. It got to a point where I had no more to give. I was dried up and worthless. Getting out was just self-preservation.

Now I'm crying cuz I hate seeing him hurting.  I hate not knowing what to do.  I know I'm never going back, but I'm not heartless.  And I hate being by myself at moments like this.

I think it's time to call it a day....

Intoxication

Talked with someone today regarding a girl, "Miss California" who slept her way through a few guys and how this person wondered about this girl.

The funny thing was that I totally identified with her. Why??? Well, you don't go from losing 120 lbs and having no self confidence to suddenly having guys interested in you and not identifying with her. But you're always wondering....do they want the body, or do they want the whole package.

The feeling of  pursuit is wonderful.  OMG, Guys suddenly want me...and they don't have too. They're not married to me, or engaged, or committed....so either they want me or they don't.  So how do you take this interest? Well, I'm flattered, but always wondering. It is my lack of self confidence...I can't deny that. Part of me knows it's just sex and the other part wants to believe it is something more...but knows better.

I want to believe that I'm a femme fatale...but what woman doesn't want to believe that?? The truth is, I'm an ordinary Jane that has glimmers of something more. Nothing more, nothing less....and that's ok. If you're too beautiful..everyone expects you to be on top of your game. If you're too plain, everyone doesn't expect anything. If you're in the middle, everyone leaves you alone and if you happen to do something out of the ordinary...well, they shrug their shoulders and let you have that fluke of a chance, cuz it'll never happen again.

Yeah, you may see my opinion as being pessimistic, but I see it as being totally optimistic. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I'm not that special (well, except in my mind, of course),  but as long as people underestimate my potential, then I have all the power to succeed or fail. There are no limitations and people cannot limit me..only I can limit myself...and I rather like it that way.

But there is always some tiny voice in the back of my head wondering if I'm good enough. If maybe everyone else is right. Do I have it....or don't I? Ah well....

Tortilla Soup Recipe

8 cups chicken broth (I use 99% or 100% fat free)

16-ounce can tomatoes 
1 onion, chopped 
3 cloves garlic 
a handful of cilantro leaves

2 to 3 chipotle peppers or ancho chilies (I use about 4-5)

Chipotle sauce

Cubed turkey or chicken

Shredded Monterey jack or PepperJack cheese 
Tortilla’s for thickening, or Tortilla strips (Homemade or store-bought)
Sour cream (I use fat free)

Avocados cut up

Lime wedges (if you like them)

In a large pot, put a couple of tablespoons of olive oil, and sauté the chopped up onion, garlic and cilantro.  Pour in about 4 oz of the tomatoes and blend with a hand blender until smooth.  (If you prefer, you can combine the tomatoes, onion, garlic and cilantro in a blender and blend until smooth.)

Add the chicken broth, and the ancho or chipotle peppers. Bring to boiling; cover and simmer for 20 minutes. I pull the peppers out after cooking but before this next step. 

Add about 6-10 tortillas (cubed). Simmer for 5 minutes more, and then hand blend again till smooth. Add the Chipotle sauce, or any hot sauce you prefer, to taste. Some people use Adobo seasoning. 

I like to make my own tortilla chips by cutting corn tortillas into strips and frying (I do not salt the strips).  However, you can use regular store tortilla chips or Fritos.  Put them in a bowl with your choice of cheese, avocados, chicken and sour cream. Pour soup over and serve hot. You can squeeze a little lime on it if you like.

If I feel ambitious enough, I’ll add a chicken (skinless) to a pot of 8 cups chicken broth and 4 cups water.  I wrap the chicken with onions, carrots and the Ancho chilies in cheese cloth and put the whole thing into the pot.  So much easier to strain. I’ll strain the broth and use it for the soup and bone the chicken for later.  I’ll add a fresh tomato or two to the mix.

Play with the recipe and tune it to your taste, that’s what I did.  The recipe above is a combination of a few recipes I found on the web, but I played with it until it tasted like I remembered from my trips to Mexico.

New Tip:  My new favorite addition is the Embassa Chipotle peppers in sauce (in place of the Chipotle sauce listed above). You can find the cans in the Mexican section at Raleys/Bel Air.  The flavor is so awesome, but beware the heat!

Tortilla Soup

If you’ve been to Mexico, you know what I’m talking about.  Not the restaurant chain version of tortilla soup, but the authentic version found in family owned restaurants.  I remember the first time I had it.  I was by myself at the time (can’t remember why), but I was in this little hole-in-the-wall place in Puerto Vallarta in 96.  I know I had to be unsettled, because that is usually when I order soup on a menu.

Out comes this steaming bowl of a reddish broth, with crispy tortilla strips, big chunks of avocado, chicken, cilantro, and a Mexican crema on top, with some lime wedges on the side.  The smell was heavenly, but the taste was on par with the best chicken soup in the world…just kicked up a notch. Creamy and crunchy vied for dominance, but I remember closing my eyes and knowing…I will recreate this soup, come hell or high water.

Cut to Seventeen years later (jaysus I’m old!), and I’m still tweaking and perfecting my version, but it comes pretty damned close to what I ate (minus the crema…I always have difficulty finding it).   I like to make it after Thanksgiving because if I do the broth from scratch, I use the turkey bones and leftovers to make it.  It’s been awhile since I’ve made it, and I figured it was time…and if I’m not mistaken…the first time in my new home.  It’s a bit labor intensive, but the results can’t be argued.  Tuesday, I began the process, and today, I brought the results in to work for my co-workers.  Don’t worry; when you’re using Turkey bones, you tend to have a ton of broth.  I still have a huge container in my fridge at home.

No, this blog isn’t about eating Tortilla soup, although it may read like it from the aforementioned paragraphs, it’s about the feeling it gives me when I make and eat it. This morning, it was about 25 degrees outside so it’s the perfect time for a warm slightly spicy soup.  Being that I started the soup on Tuesday…and that was the evening my sister pulled her shenanigans, there had to be some divine intervention going on to ensure I had busy time in the kitchen. When my hands are working and I’m creating, I’m not as hell bent on vengeance and walking around the house ranting. 

When I’m at my lowest, I find that random acts of kindness always make me feel better.  Making soup and bringing it in to my co-workers makes me feel like I’m a part of something bigger than myself.  This life isn’t all about me, and contributing to things beyond me keeps me in check.

There’s something soothing about soup. It soothes my stomach, my soul and calms my mind because there’s something about the methodical lifting of the spoon, and slurping, feeling the warmth slide down my throat and permeates my core.  It doesn’t weigh me down like other things will, and I sleep better after having a bowl of soup for dinner.

The Curse of Family

No, not all family…but there’s always someone in the mix that likes to frak everything up.  In my family…it’s my sister, hands down! Last night was no exception.

I got a call from my mother. My sister had told her that her boyfriend was paying for the rental car for my Boy (our boy, i.e. she’s the natural mother and I’m the adopted one) and she’s expecting us (i.e. my Mom, me and the ex) to kick in for his other expenses.  She also said that she had contacted “S” (the wonderful Mom who adopted her other son, my Nephew, - at birth) and S was going to put some money to the cause.

BDDS –

1.       Where the hell does she get off saying she expects something, especially without a phone call to me?  Do you not think I may have already discussed these plans with my Boy? Do you not think, as his parent, that I know what my responsibilities are? Like you could ever tell me.

2.       Where the hell does she get off expecting my mother to kick in when her income is limited?

3.       But the biggest infraction…WHAT THE EFF DOES SHE THINK SHE’S DOING CALLING S???  Hasn’t this woman done enough by adopting your son, taking care of him through thick and thin, then suffering through is passing away? REALLY?  You are every inch the bitch I think you are!

My Mom doesn’t know S well enough to talk to her about this whole fiasco, but I do.  So I pick up the phone and call.  No, S hasn’t heard from my Sister in a year.  Ok, my sister is just a lying, manipulative scum!  I was so upset over the whole thing and now I’ve managed to involve S in this crap.  Of course, she wants to help out with the boys visit, but it isn’t necessary.  His Dad and I can handle what needs to be done. But really???  My sister just takes this to a whole new level.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again.  When my niece is grown, I never have to be a part of my sister’s life again, and I’m really looking forward to it.  When a person doesn’t bring any benefit to your life, other than their child, what is the point? I can put up with her for my Niece’s sake, but after that…all bets are off!

On a different note:  I saw another reference to text fighting and the person answering the query put it perfectly “Stop fighting (communicating) by text. Texting strips away context, facial expression, voice inflection and elaboration, also known as everything human beings use to indicate their tone”. 

Wow! Too bad I had to learn that the hard way.  Don’t get me wrong, I’d been pissing and moaning about too much texting and just didn’t say it as well as the aforementioned reference.  But text fighting is a HUGE mistake. So many things can be read wrong in a text fight. Thought that quote was worth sharing.

Christmas Smackdown!!!

So I bought icicle lights and got my sorry ass on the roof today. I strung my lights along the roofline and then, when I hit the solar panels, I got out the ladder extension and painstakingly put the clips along the edge, stretched out the icicles and clipped the wires into place.

I watched the sky get darker as I rounded the corner of the house, but I persisted until I was done.  I packed up my stuff, hauled the ladder back to the shed and locked it up, took my stuff into the house and got ready for my special moment.

I leaned in the house...flipped the switch and ran outside to behold my home lit up with the most awesome wonderful speckles of white lights all along the trim.  Excitedly, I ran around the corner to see what the trim would look like from the yard.  Spectacular!!!  There was a tiny section right at the top of the roof that would need tweaking, because it was dark, but everything else looked wonderful. And then..........THE LIGHTS WENT DARK!!!

Damn it!  I got out my trusty mag light and went to check the fuse box. Everything looks ok, but just to make sure, I flipped a bunch of switches. No luck.  Dizzy has no idea why her precious lights went out. Yeah, I'll have to check the plugs tomorrow, and try plugging it in somewhere else. What a damper!

Back to Work

So it was back to work today. Had to catch up on the emails and the new project my management would like me to tackle. It's always fun checking in with the group to see how everyone is doing...of course half the group was gone, but it is what it is.

It was also nice getting back into the swing with my guy. I adore getting my morning text and phone call from him. He always makes me laugh.

I bought some more icicle lights for the house and put them up on the patio. I seriously debated about getting on the roof and finishing the job, but it was dark, and it's just plain stupid to be on the roof in the dark.  It was close, but common sense ruled the day. The light switches to the eves work like a charm!  I have one in the living room and one in the bedroom, so I can turn the outside christmas lights on and off.  I love it!

You know...this is a well made little house. I really like how it turned out. Now, after saying goodnight to my guy (he usually calls me in the evening too), I'm ready for the tub and for bed.  I need to be kicking Vin Diesel's ass tomorrow.  Been seriously slacking. And I need to be in top shape for the end of this month!

G'night Peeps!

Christmas At Casa de Cromwell

Today was all about Christmas.  When I woke up, I hadn’t received my morning text from my guy, so I had to bust his chops!  I wake up my girl and make her breakfast and then…It’s time to put up the tree.  I pull all the necessary accoutrements out from the shed and she mans the remote for Netflix and plays all Christmas movies.  After putting the tree together, we have to fan out the branches…which takes awhile. She hates that part, but I’ve always loved the busy work of it.

We then pull out all of the ornaments.  After stringing the lights, I explain the importance of some the ornaments….her first shoe (which her mother had thrown away, and I scooped up), her brother’s dog tags, the army hat, the Marine jersey (for her brother N that passed away), the Marine boots (for J), the Wizard of Oz ornaments…and the list goes on. She takes great care in placing them on the tree. She stands back and peruses her work…nope, gotta move that one.  God, I love this girl!!!

She then helps me untangle the outside lights and for the first time in years (definitely the first time for me in this home), I string up lights outside. She badly wants to get on the ladder with me, but after my fall last year, this is a definite no-no.

Soon, her Mom pulls up and it’s time for her to go.  We always have a hard time with that part.  I think it’s because she lived with me from the time she was 9 months old until about 4 ½. A bond was forged that her mother cannot break (although she’s tried many times) and it’ll be with us both till the day we die.  I don’t know what I did to deserve it, but I’m blessed beyond measure with this girl!